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WIN: Entries to the 2014 Trans Karoo up for grabs


Matt

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We were competing in a mtb race. I was leading the womens section and was at that stage all alone with no men around me. I really needed to go to the bathroom (with a nr 1) but was scared that i might loose my position in the race so i did not want to stop.

 

I decided that i will just slow down a little bit and pull down my short and try and do it on the go. Everything went well untill i heard the cameraman's motorcycle coming!! I tried to pull up my shorts with the one free hand but it got stuck on the nose of saddle. I tried everything but it was too late, the cameraman came from behind (my shorts still down) and proceeded about 20m past me.

 

He braked and rode next to me and just said: " DONT WORRY LADY, WE WONT PUT THAT ON TELEVISION - ITS A FAMILY SHOW!!!!"

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So it is Saturday morning and we are off to ride a casual mtb track in Pretoria. I thought well it is time to get ride of the normal pedals and change them with spd pedals. Now remember this is the first time out with the pedals where my feet is attached to the pedals, something new for me! Right everything is setup and checked the night before. Off we go and getting to the place take off the bikes a lot of people around us i get on the bike and forget once i have clicked in move your heel to the out side no no no i forgot and in the parking area i fell over busted my knee blood running.

 

Well i am here let just continue with a super red and a damaged leg we are off.

It is not even 10 km on the track and again i come plundering down from a hill over the handle bars hitting my hip to a numb on a rock. Everyone laughs as i came down, with the one girl saying i thing you should take off the pedals or rather walk. At the end of the day my new nick name is "click, click"

 

Well i must say total of 8 falls within the first week with spd pedals and a lot of laughing, i still continue to concur the amazing nature and mtb trails.

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Ek het Oktober 2004 begin fietsry en ook sommer ingeskryf vir die Argus (sub 3uur)was die mikpunt.Ons plaaslike "road race" was die Dup's cycles 100km.Ek het ingeskryf en was ook hard aan die oefen vir die Argus so vertel ek ook vir almal wat wil luister ek gaan die Dup's wen. Die dag het aangebreuk en ek was reg, genoeg energie staffies vir die hele peleton,.Die skoot het geklap en daar trek die peleton nodig om te sê het ek so 2km gehou en toe spoeg hulle my met n spoed by die agter deur uit. Ek moes my wonde lek en die res van die wedren 97km alleen ry.

 

Die grootste vernedering het by die eind punt gewag toe almal my "cheer" toe ek klaar maak, nooit weer was ek so grootbek nie

 

 

Wel ek sal "like"om die Trans Karoo te wen en jammer ek het nie fondse vir die inskrywing hopelik wen ek n inskrywing dan gaan die pro's les opsê.hehehehehehe

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Arrived at the Porcupine Hills mountainbike race in Franschoek to find I had only packed one cycle shoe.

As I had driven up in slip slops I had no choice but to borrow my friends running shoe. He is a size 10, I am a size 4 we used insulation tape to get the shoe tight enough to stay on. I rode with one foot cleated and one enourmous foot trying to not catch the front wheel. looked like a clown, felt like a clown but I still had fun and it still makes us laugh a year later!.

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I was 16, full of hormones and spots in equal measure and a girl had just moved into the house next door. She was beautiful enough to make me nervous. The kind of girl that makes you run through conversations in your head just to make sure you don’t stuff it up when she talks to you. Something that guarantees you’ll stuff it up when she talks to you.

 

I didn’t yet have a motorbike on which to embrace my teenage freedom so I had to make do with my bicycle, a purple Diamondback Topanga. In an ill fated attempt to look cool while riding it, I had spray painted my SABC TopSport helmet a matching purple a few years earlier. The helmet was enormous to match my awkwardly sized teenage head and TopSport hadn’t spared the cushioning in this thing either. The net result was that when I wore it I looked like a penis. I even noticed my friend’s mom blush when I arrived at their house. Being a teenager, not looking like a giant pork sword in front of girls was more important than my safety so the helmet got left in the back of the cupboard.

 

Someone who didn’t care about my image as much as my wellbeing was my mom. Maybe she just didn’t realise that I looked like a weiner on wheels when I wore it but if she was around she would insist that I ride with my helmet on. The Hub would have loved her. So as I was sneaking out the drive on my bike (sans lid) one day I heard her voice from the top of the garden, “HELMET!” (The Hub would have really loved her). I tried protesting but it was pointless, I was going to have to wear it, or pretend to at least. I reluctantly walked back up the drive, took my helmet from her and stuck it on my head. I left the straps unfastened, ready to take the replica bell end off the moment I turned the corner.

 

As I was pedalling away I felt I was nearly far enough to be able to safely remove the purple mushroom without being spotted. At exactly that moment the neighbour turned into our street in his convertible. An electric shock ran down my body as I saw who was sitting in the front passenger seat: hot-girl-next-door. And they were approaching the pedalling winky rapidly. I couldn’t afford to be seen like this. In a moment of panic I flicked my head back hoping to eject the helmet and save some face. Unfortunately the straps, despite being loose, were still over my ears and my ears were coming second only to my head in my body’s race for dimensions. The straps caught on my wingnuts and instead of flying off the back of my head the helmet flew forward and covered my entire face. I was blind, in every sense of the word.

 

If the occupants of the car hadn’t noticed the gangly kid on the bike earlier they sure as hell noticed him when he started weaving all over the road with what looked like a todger tip covering his face. And they definitely noticed it when he crossed right in front of their bonnet and rode into the ditch.

 

When I pulled the willy cap off my face I found that they had pulled up next to me. It was clear that they wanted to see if I was okay, and I sensed that her dad was trying especially hard to ask but just couldn’t get a word out between laughing, apologising for laughing and laughing even harder. And she could barely look at me she was laughing so uncontrollably.

 

I mumbled something and rode off. The helmet stayed in the ditch along with my dignity and any shred of a chance I’d ever had of kissing that girl (or any of her friends as it turned out).

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I was slumming it in London, and doing cycle courier work for some money.

 

One evening whilst commuting back to my digs with a good friend riding side by side, I decided to show off my "at one with my bike skills" and did a long distance wheelie past a family seeing off some friends.

My wet v brakes failed and I flipped doing a slip and slide show on my back, much to the amusement of the family and the embarrassment of my good mate and me.

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some years ago,I ride the morning bunch in PE around marine drive so I have to leave home at 05h00 and in winter its still dark.

So at night I get everything ready so not to disturb vroulief, early I get dressed in the dark.

Halfway aroung Marine drive I look down to see my pants inside out with the red butt pad shining away.

I did a very sudden slowdown and solo home.

regards inside out.

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some years ago,I ride the morning bunch in PE around marine drive so I have to leave home at 05h00 and in winter its still dark.

So at night I get everything ready so not to disturb vroulief, early I get dressed in the dark.

Halfway aroung Marine drive I look down to see my pants inside out with the red butt pad shining away.

I did a very sudden slowdown and solo home.

regards inside out.

 

Hahaha, that's a winner!

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Hubby, son and I enter Redstone MTB race in Harties. I am very social so chat away to every 2nd person, with him trailing behind me (as husbands often do), and suddenly notice that my husband has put on the bibshorts he ripped at Hakahana. Hairy bum in full view, and he didn't have a clue! Thank heavens for the cable ties in our tool bag!! Would upload the cable tie pic if I knew how!

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Haha..Getting on the 2014 Attakwas video!! Not for keeping up with Urs, or great riding skills but for my spectacular slomo endo. Cameras don't show how steep and rough terrain really is :ph34r: and there I lost all my descending confidence. I tell you it was rough man! Unforgettable ride it was.

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Having to call a friend's mom to come and pick me up from Groenies after my chain broke- felt like a real tjop.

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Did our first Argus in 2010. Got new pedals and shoes just two weeks before the big day. Was the first time riding with cleats. Did the whole Argus in the wind and finished battered and bruised in 6:25. Surviving the whole route without having an incident with the new pedals and shoes.

 

Got our Coke and medal and headed home. At the first traffic light we stopped at, the inevitable happened and I forgot I was wearing cleats. Spectacular slow-mo fall in front of hundreds of people.

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So we're always a bunch of roadie friends hitting MTB races for a bit of fun. There was 6 of us doing the Vineyard MTB Classic at Laurensford Wine Estate, culminating the end of the ABSA Cape Epic. We're always giving each other a hard time if either of us takes a fall...usually resulting in an embarrassing picture of the 'victim' on all 4's in the mud, bushes and even rivers. During the race coming down a longish decent, I was out front and struck a tree root wrong and came down tumbling over the bars. In an attempt to avoid any further embarrassment, I jumped up as soon as I could, got on my bike and off I went before the 1st of my friends managed to see me. As I was descending, they obviously had now caught up to me because of my incident, the gradient increased quite a bit and a rocky river crossing approached us swiftly. Reaching for my brakes, I realised that my handlebar had swivelled 180 degrees and my brakes were suddenly on the inside which I had overlooked during my hasty recovery from the 1st fall...and of course I took a massive tumble hitting the boulders and losing control with all my buddies as witness. I still haven't heard the end of that 1. My pride took a hit that day and I've learnt a lesson or two in the process...rather bring up the rear ;)

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Out on a early morning winter ride about 10km from home. I was still relaxing at the back of the group when my stomach got into the rhythm of things, and gave a big turn. So as you do, I got out of the saddle and let the big morning fart rip..... immediately I was faced with a the question. Was this really just a lekke fart or did I ACTUALLY just sh%t myself. So, am I just sweating a bit more than usual this morning.... with the temperature round 2-3 degrees, it made it difficult to decide. So I put my ass back onto the saddle and very quickly realised that I needed to excuse myself from the rest of the ride. Being a newby to group made it easy never to return.......

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I was 16, full of hormones and spots in equal measure and a girl had just moved into the house next door. She was beautiful enough to make me nervous. The kind of girl that makes you run through conversations in your head just to make sure you don’t stuff it up when she talks to you. Something that guarantees you’ll stuff it up when she talks to you.

 

I didn’t yet have a motorbike on which to embrace my teenage freedom so I had to make do with my bicycle, a purple Diamondback Topanga. In an ill fated attempt to look cool while riding it, I had spray painted my SABC TopSport helmet a matching purple a few years earlier. The helmet was enormous to match my awkwardly sized teenage head and TopSport hadn’t spared the cushioning in this thing either. The net result was that when I wore it I looked like a penis. I even noticed my friend’s mom blush when I arrived at their house. Being a teenager, not looking like a giant pork sword in front of girls was more important than my safety so the helmet got left in the back of the cupboard.

 

Someone who didn’t care about my image as much as my wellbeing was my mom. Maybe she just didn’t realise that I looked like a weiner on wheels when I wore it but if she was around she would insist that I ride with my helmet on. The Hub would have loved her. So as I was sneaking out the drive on my bike (sans lid) one day I heard her voice from the top of the garden, “HELMET!” (The Hub would have really loved her). I tried protesting but it was pointless, I was going to have to wear it, or pretend to at least. I reluctantly walked back up the drive, took my helmet from her and stuck it on my head. I left the straps unfastened, ready to take the replica bell end off the moment I turned the corner.

 

As I was pedalling away I felt I was nearly far enough to be able to safely remove the purple mushroom without being spotted. At exactly that moment the neighbour turned into our street in his convertible. An electric shock ran down my body as I saw who was sitting in the front passenger seat: hot-girl-next-door. And they were approaching the pedalling winky rapidly. I couldn’t afford to be seen like this. In a moment of panic I flicked my head back hoping to eject the helmet and save some face. Unfortunately the straps, despite being loose, were still over my ears and my ears were coming second only to my head in my body’s race for dimensions. The straps caught on my wingnuts and instead of flying off the back of my head the helmet flew forward and covered my entire face. I was blind, in every sense of the word.

 

If the occupants of the car hadn’t noticed the gangly kid on the bike earlier they sure as hell noticed him when he started weaving all over the road with what looked like a todger tip covering his face. And they definitely noticed it when he crossed right in front of their bonnet and rode into the ditch.

 

When I pulled the willy cap off my face I found that they had pulled up next to me. It was clear that they wanted to see if I was okay, and I sensed that her dad was trying especially hard to ask but just couldn’t get a word out between laughing, apologising for laughing and laughing even harder. And she could barely look at me she was laughing so uncontrollably.

 

I mumbled something and rode off. The helmet stayed in the ditch along with my dignity and any shred of a chance I’d ever had of kissing that girl (or any of her friends as it turned out).

 

I had tears streaming down my face reading this. Well you didn't get the kiss, but she will remember you for the rest of her life.

This guys has GOT to get an entry

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