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Cult of extream discipline


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This is going to be a slightly longer post as I need to give background and context to the idea. The story begins about two weeks ago, I received a message from my girlfriend (who at the time was admitted to Poortview psychiatric hospital) that our 4 year relationship was no longer working for her and that she thought we were no longer compatible.

 

Que 2 weeks of roller coaster emotions and some deep introspection and I realize that much of this situation is because of my actions and speaks volumes of who I had become (or rather not become) in the confines of a comfortable relationship. To name but a few; I had started drinking too much, packing on weight, had a lackluster attitude to work performance (I earn commission only so this directly showed in my ability to contribute to household upkeep), I had developed a general attitude of complacency in life.

 

Fast forward to today, here I am thinking, there are so many lost souls out there who can do with some guidance and discipline, why not form a commune/cult of discipline of sorts, rent out a 3 bedroom house each guy that buys into the idea forks in 6k a month, stack rooms with 2 single beds each, live together with the following goals: everyone is up at 4:30am, daily compulsory training sessions, meal prep is done together (cooking only healthy meals), compulsory self improvement lectures every night (masterclass tutorials etc.) the idea would be that it would be a 6 months transformation program of sorts, with each individual pushing their peers to higher levels.

 

If the idea resonates with your, or might work for someone you know give me a shout (pm or whatever)

 

PS. my thinking that got me here was a process of critically evaluating mental health issues, and seeing dozens of great people ruined by reaching for easy out options (basically medicating live problems away)

 

*edit grammar

Edited by Sitting@89
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This is going to be a slightly longer post as I need to give background and context to the idea. The story begins about two weeks ago, I received a message from my girlfriend (who at the time was admitted to Poortview psychiatric hospital) that our 4 year relationship was no longer working for her and that she thought we were no longer compatible.

 

Que 2 weeks of roller coaster emotions and some deep introspection and I realize that much of this situation is because of my actions and speaks volumes of who I had become (or rather not become) in the confines of a comfortable relationship. To name but a few; I had started drinking too much, packing on weight, had a lackluster attitude to work performance (I earn commission only so this directly showed in my ability to contribute to household upkeep), I had developed a general attitude of complacency in life.

 

Fast forward to today, here I am thinking, there are so many lost souls out there who can do with some guidance and discipline, why not form a commune/cult of discipline of sorts, rent out a 3 bedroom house each guy that buys into the idea forks in 6k a month, stack rooms with 2 single beds each, live together with the following goals: everyone is up at 4:30am, daily compulsory training sessions, meal prep is done together (cooking only healthy meals), compulsory self improvement lectures every night (masterclass tutorials etc.) the idea would be that it would be a 6 months transformation program of sorts, with each individual pushing there peers to higher levels.

 

If the idea resonates with your, or might work for someone you know give me a shout (pm or whatever)

 

PS. my thinking that got me here was a process of critically evaluating metal health issues, and seeing dozens of great people ruined by reaching for easy out options (basically medicating live problems away)     

 

Sounds like you might want to join the army

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If getting fat, losing your girlfriend, not earning enough because you don’t work hard enough is not enough motivation to change your ways, I’m not sure someone shouting at you at 4:30 in the morning to get out of bed will be any different. At some stage you’ll have to realise you have to push yourself if you want to achieve anything. If you don’t care about yourself enough to make it happen, why would anyone else?

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If getting fat, losing your girlfriend, not earning enough because you don’t work hard enough is not enough motivation to change your ways, I’m not sure someone shouting at you at 4:30 in the morning to get out of bed will be any different. At some stage you’ll have to realise you have to push yourself if you want to achieve anything. If you don’t care about yourself enough to make it happen, why would anyone else?

DITTO!!! Well said....

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So it sounds like you are lacking a support network OP.

You have clearly made some hard decisions to get to this point, and you know it's not sustainable if you are on your own. 

Sure, a burden shared, is a burden halved which in a situation with random strangers, brings it's own set of interpersonal problems, causing stress and emotions on a different front. You may disagree about the amount of mushed chickpeas with your beansprouts is acceptable, and that's how the fight start.

 

The word cult, shouldn't be used to describe something with good intentions..they seldom end well.

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If you can not motivate yourself, no one else will be able to motivate you. They would be forcing you and that will lead to hatred. I'm yet to see anyone doing something wholeheartedly that they hate doing. Rather dig deep and start off small. Motivate yourself by setting attainable goals in a decent time. Do not just think about it, but write it down and measure your performance so you can see if what you are doing is working or not. Speak to others for help and encouragement, shutting yourself out will do no good mentally.

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If you can not motivate yourself, no one else will be able to motivate you. They would be forcing you and that will lead to hatred. I'm yet to see anyone doing something wholeheartedly that they hate doing. Rather dig deep and start off small. Motivate yourself by setting attainable goals in a decent time. Do not just think about it, but write it down and measure your performance so you can see if what you are doing is working or not. Speak to others for help and encouragement, shutting yourself out will do no good mentally.

Enough said .......@ Mods please close this tread , it's going to turn ugly 

Edited by Help.Me.
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I am not a psychologist, I have had proper depression before and felt like you do. Some advice, it may be useful or not.

 

I can only reiterate the advice above:

 

"Rather dig deep and start off small. Motivate yourself by setting attainable goals in a decent time. Do not just think about it, but write it down and measure your performance so you can see if what you are doing is working or not. "

 

Don't try change everything in one day, start with basic work tasks, list only a few of them, get them done and the satisfaction of getting them done, will make you more positive, to possibly expand the next day.

 

Secondly, spend time with friends, even if it is chatting online in these covid times. Your mates show you there is a normal other world out there, make you laugh and show you that things are not that bad.

 

Third, lay off the booze (only a beer or two a night) and keep your place clean. Make your bed each morning:

 

Lastly, ride your bike. Perhaps make an arrangement to meet a mate at the traffic light up the road at 06:00. Knowing that he / she is there will get you out of bed and it will get your endorphins up early in the day. 

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