The much vaunted race between Shrek and the Wafflemeister meant that Red and I had to not only get our respective partners to Scottburgh but we had to do this as quickly as possible. We spent the night before the start of the trail at the new Glencairn facilities which, are fantastic, we had the best tents, mattresses and showers of all three days. The only negative was the poor quality of oversized kit especially for the noobs who quite rightly were expecting the usual high quality of Sani2c kit. Ah well, I guess that high standard couldn’t have lasted forever. Bikes were prepared for the next day’s battle, my rear tyre needed new sealant and after a problem I had on Gravel & Grape with the tyre not seating properly I decided to pump it to 3,5 bar and leave it overnight to seat properly and reduce the pressure in the morning before the ride. The beers flowed as Shrek and Waffle gave each other gears about the next day’s battle, we were a group of 8 riders with 3 noobs and advice was being dispensed freely from the veterans. All of which came to an abrupt end as the first bout of rain brought a sense of foreboding to bear on noobs and veterans alike so we finished our beers and retired to our tents with a new battle cry “Sleepy, sleepy hand off pee pee”
We awoke to a misty morning and the morning battle cry of” Wakey, wakey hand off snaky”; this team is obsessed with their nether regions. Waffle and I set off a batch ahead of Shrek and Red which was not ideal as we had no idea if we were leading or not, they could be just a minute behind out of sight but nine minutes in the lead. So we decided to set off at my pace with Waffle sitting slip whenever he could which we thought should be quicker than Shrek could get his 120 kg frame to go. The weakness in the plan was that the rest of our party were in Shrek’s batch and the other five riders were determined to help him make a race of it and one of the riders, Jimbo, had dropped down from A batch and had some serious skills and speed. Our little plan did not last for long as Waffle called time out on View Point climb and suggested that we hold the horses back somewhat. I realised from that moment that the race was effectively over and we settled into a pace and rhythm that would ensure a finish. I would attack the single track sections for fun and wait for Waffle to catch up to slipstream on the flats. Waffle was more than holding his own and more than once I saw his cramp induced grimace change into a smile as the Sani single tracks found a new fan. Waffle took time out at the Pevency water table to greet a family friend who was serving us, the way her face lit up when she saw him made our day, unfortunately we had a race to ride and we had to move on. But what stayed with us is how the Sani impacts positively on the lives of communities that surround it. Other than my back problems I have another medical problem which I had developed from eating too many Contador steaks namely Mad Cow. It manifests itself on fast descents, gnarly or not makes no difference the Mad Cow takes over and I attack the descent with only one goal in mind Speed. My overall time for the day is less important than my max speed on my Garmin and there is a particular descent on a gravel road before the Xumeni forest that was my target. In the days of 3 x 10 chain rings I managed 78 km/h on what was a very rough district road riddled by erosion trenches. In today’s world of 2x10, 78 km/h was highly unlikely as a 38/11 combination has you spinning out at 55km/h so my target was 60. Imagine my surprise when we exited the forest single track onto a freshly graded gravel road. 70 said the Mad Cow and we were off the numbers on the Garmin my focus, 30 k - passing other riders on the far right, 45k - more riders watch the drifting rider, nice butt, use the drainage channel to pass, duck under the branches. 55k- spinning out, 60k -passing Nick on the right, sharp turn back wheel sliding, ….3,5 huh? That’s not on my Garmin. 65k - get aerodynamic use the dropper post. Another turn, back wheel into a serious slide, need to correct the slide 3,5, what is it with this 3,5? The Racing Ralph on the rear has no grip 3,5, there it is again. 68k - three arrows for a sharp turn, don’t touch the brakes, almost there. 3,5, damn! I forgot to deflate the tyre no wonder we’re in a serious slide, let it drift and overtake on the right. Downhill done, what’s the score …Garmin scrolls …….69,9km/h aaargh! And this is what it looks like in pictures oh, if you want to feel the Mad Cow play the music loud!
The babe with the nice butt showed us up on the next climb (okay she was holding onto to her partners back pocket). The descent through Xumeni was quick and we had great dice with another team that was equally adept at descending. We were held up a little through Wappos by other riders and this Farmer Glen chappie walking on the path but a hard ride on the next descent gave us a clear run on the next single track. The time difference between the teams was sufficient to bring the racing aspect to an end, Shrek found the climbing and distance tough but although slower than us he finished in a more than respectable time. I pestered all that paid me any mind with tales of my descending exploits including seeking out Nixm and retelling my story to her and her partner to the point of boredom. My other companions dealt with this by buying me beer in an attempt to shut me up. However, the story of the day belonged to Jimbo, who was simply having a blast playfully wheeling, bunny hopping and doing endos at every opportunity. He showed his riding mates some serious skill by bunny hopping the entire railway line with an endo front wheel landing. This raised a comment from a pretty lady rider “Now you’re just showing off” she said, with a glint in his eye and a sparkling smile he responded “Not really my angel”. Her riposte? “You’re not dead and I’m not an Angel”! We have a clear winner.Click here to view the article
