CV received..... funny...... tee heeee!!!!!!

[Hendrik Petoors]

Dear Sir/Love <?:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

Re: APPLICATION FOR MY JOB

I am applying to my job of security guard to you boss in you company of VODACOM.

I write it with capital leters to show you I love it. I complete to grade 10 matric examination certificate in 2002.

I am 22 years to be born of age and no merid and not has childrains. My father is sick long ago time and my mother mary in <?:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />Swazilandon> country,10 years now no she come to see me.

No body known to help me. My certificate is just sitting home but passes in Accounting, Business Economics, Mathematics and but fail in English because of the English teacher is jealous of me.

I here people say you want security guards to you company and I tell you I am one of that job experience for 3 Years. I want to join the company of you. Please consider my application careful and call me any time because I am red for interview.

I am honest and can speak English free.

Please also greet your wife and your nice car.

I am your honest security

T.R Michaels

Cell:082 555 4540 not 083 555 4540 because I hate MTN and I love like VODACOM. That?s why I apply to VODACOM post on my security.

MY CV is in the next page

MY CURRICULUM VITA

Name:                                   T.R Michaels

ID no:                                   082 555 4540

Health:                                 I eat healthy food and drink only Castle Larger.

Language:                           English

Drivers License:                  I can drive a fire arm for shoot a thief with my strong fingers.

Highest Standard Passed:           Grade 10 which is the same as STD 10 at the past years.

Criminal Offence:               No Sir, I do not do crime.

Hobbies:                              I like to tell the people that VODACOM is the best cell phone.

Extramural Activities:        I advise the priests not to steal my wife.

Tertiary Qualifications:     Merit award for being the nice security.

[MichH]

Nice!

 

Quite convincing for a security officer, wait, don't they have to file reports if they apprehend a thief? He may fail in the writing reports section!

[Canaris]

He can apply at the SANDF

[Mudsimus]

He can apply at the SANDF

 

What do you mean? He can probably get into med school....

 

Those are some sought after qualifications..