GrumpyOldGuy

I can iron, I went to the army.! I recon everyone who went to the army irons well, you had to, unless you liked running to the tree to catch a butterfly. I still iron today, I dont like my clothes all creased, makes me feel untidy. Forget the Plank (ironing board) you dont need it, no one in the army had an ironing board and I still dont use one. You need a nice steam iron though, relatively cheap, go get one, then cut off that dumb 2 prong plug, you dont need that either, put on a good three prong plug. Now clear all the beer bottles from your kitchen table, wipe it down well and lay a big beach towel or an old blanket over it, this is what you iron on. Pour yourself a drink, any one which takes your fancy, doesn't matter, I like a whiskey... heat up the iron and lay your T Shirt out on the towel like you would wear it, start ironing,...this method worked for millions of us old troops, it will work for you- some things dont need to be improved on

Its hot out, grab your shades a cold one and head to the beach, put this on yer headphones.............**Deep sigh**....Everything is going to be all right...!

I am glad you sought solace Landy, even if it was just a from an informal chat with someone who understands. Remember "God always provides the ingredients for our daily bread, but he leaves us to do the baking." I wish you well.

Yah, Hillbrow had great food joints, when I was an appy you had to do 3 months a year at the jhb technicon as part of your apprenticeship, it was great because it was normal college hours and we were gone at 3pm daily,..... usually to some pub just down the road in Hillbrow! There was also that coffee shop on the first floor opposite the old indoor pool in Hillbrow, it was super, thick heavy arm chairs and the best coffee and cake for next to nothing. People say there all day reading the newspaper and just enjoying the atmosphere, it really started the coffee shop craze in JHB I think. Cant remember its name now. .....and the Hillbrow indoor pool....epic, it was underground and cost R2.00 to get in, it was heated by coal furnaces so the water was always 28 degrees or warmer, winter or summer, it was olympic size and many swim galas were held there, I went there regularly, we didn't have a pool back then, but my memory is of walking down the steps to the pool and getting that strong smell of Jeyes fluid which they used copiously for cleaning in the change rooms and around the pool. Strange how we remember these odd things.

I remember the President, but they dont ring a bell, its possible I guess, just forgot. Most of the time I went to "The Chelsea" in Hillbrow, excellent Club/ Pub even saw David Kramer there a few times, he cut his teeth there. Then of course the Bella Napoli, ..........!!! Afterwards to Mi-Vami, it was packed 24 hours a day, its where Alan Pick now of the "Butcher Shop and Grill" in Sandton and Cape Town started his restaurant career, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, they pumped out great music and the best Sharwamas in the country, all from a little shop no bigger than the average home dining room, people stood in lines 20 deep all night to get in. .....and of course Fontana's grilled chicken, I would drive for miles to get one, also a 24 hour a day 7 day a week operation..........I struggled to find a restaurant with an open kitchen after 10 pm last night.

Durban had some great Pubs, I fondly remember spending many a nigh drinking kegs of beer at "Fathers Moustache" well known for getting "The blarney brothers" on the map, but my favourite band there was Glam......they were excellent, Joe Parker also played there quite a lot. .....and of course who could forget Smugglers Inn.......!! I spent many a Friday afternoon there, they still made the best steak in town at the time,...commonly known as "Steak Egg and Strips"

You are a good man Honk Donk, there is never a need to retaliate or seek vengeance, just let it be, hold your higher ground and dont seek to hurt back,... be like a sponge, just absorb it and let it go. I wish you well.

A little Chris Rea...."Road to Hell",..... matches my mood today. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OA1V7cI28hI

I would echo Myles comments Landy, you may be mentally strong but there's a lot to put to bed in your mind, and you can only deal with things once you have them ordered, then your mind can deal with it, lock it up, and put it away, if you dont do this your mind will come back again and again and rehash everything over and over until you settle it in your head, and that's just a road to torment and heartache. If you are concerned about costs then inquire at your medical aid, most will pay for some professional counselling, but if not, then inquire about a counselor at your parish church, almost all parishes will have someone, the pain and anguish of divorce, death, addictions are not new to them, its what they deal with in the community daily, and they WILL help you,... consider it at least. I still remember you in my prayers.

Its a difficult call really, I don't do all the Facebook and Twitter and stuff so I haven't read the arguments, but I think on a certain human level you cannot always argue something just on facts alone, you have to allow for natural human sentiment as well, its extremely important. As a case in point on another thread shows, that as a fact, the informal settlements only use a small amount of the daily water supplied, however it angers people on an emotional level to see hose pipes running in the street and they want it stopped, not because its going to realistically change the levels, but because on an emotional level it irks them and they feel angered. This is a perfectly understandable response by the way, average people aren't dealing only in facts, they are not in court, they are however very much dealing with their human emotions to a known issue, and sometimes like now, those emotions "should" in my opinion be given due credit as well. I am not in a position to say wither the event should go ahead or not, but even though the impact on the water use may be small, people, it appears, are seeing it as "unnecessary" and possibly even having a negative impact, and very often people will stand up and fight for their beliefs,.........which is something I imagine the organisers would be keen to avoid. If it goes ahead I think there will need to be a massive media transmission explaining the planning, however, this must take into account all the emotional concerns as well as the factual ones, people want to know they have been heard and their sentiments have been considered, if they concentrate too much on just the facts, you will leave a lot of people frustrated and behind the curve, and that could possibly spell disaster.

Ha, ha, that's just too cool, ...that face........!

Kind of face only a mother could love...

I don't read fiction but a few non fiction books that stood out for me were - 1.Where divers dare - the hunt for the last U-Boat by Randall Peffer - this was one of the best I have read. 2. The Penguin Lessons - by Tom Mitchell - well worth a read. 3. Setting the Hook - A divers return to the Andrea Doria - by Peter. M.Hunt. 4. 81 days below Zero - by Brian Murphy - about a world war 2 pilot lost in Alaska. If I had to pick a 5th it would be - Rescue of the Bounty - by Michael Tougias. I have just started Oil and Ice by Peter Nichols, seems to be good so far, about the whaling Dynasty.

Time heals everything NoMore Landy, but try and forgive (yourself and your partner) and avoid judgments that do not take into account the complexity of the situation, try and move forward with a good heart. Maybe consider going to see a Psychologist for a few sessions, it helps to talk and learn to understand the way you are feeling. I would urge you to continue going to your church, it is a refuge for the wounded in life, and for spirits in turmoil, allow it to lead you beyond your daily physical limitations to a greater inner peace and renewed hope. I do remember you in my prayers.

I can't offer any advice, but I can offer this inspirational prayer : May the Lord hold you and keep you, may he be gracious to you, may his face shine upon you and give you peace. I will remember you in my prayers, GoD Bless.