El Dodgius Bastardo

What's a metre?

I'm going to take a banana hammock, just in case

Okay that's it, I'm going to try this running thing. Couch to 5k is the plan

So that makes it a walking ring for adults then...

I think you've done a great thing. **** does happen and well done for owning up

So is it RIDE the rhino or RACE the rhino? Just checking, cause the two might require different apparel and gear.

Dude, you have a running coach?

Exactly, tough to improve your seeding when you get caught behind the same people twice

Somebody give that man a drumroll

Is there a spiced Gold Medal?

No fuss, I'll take the Jager brown medal

Just as well you're not first in line on that nice On One then 'eh.

Got my entry, all sorted

Distance, speed, route, etc?

I'm in

Sounds like a plan

I saw one guy have a good lie down on the first rocky descent when he ran out of courage and grabbed a handfull of shimano, almost took me with him...

Missed the Jäger, had to walk k's 9-12 due to congestion and spent 20 minutes waiting at the broken bridge...not a happy puppy. And to rider 54845, that flat tyre you had is karma for skipping the queue, you're a right toss. Thank the lord for those 2 rocky descents, which were AWESOME!

B? For braggers? Hahahaha, I'm in G, for Good G0d what a joke

Aweseom, I'll drink it halfway into my 20k ride

Nope. Just wait to the end and we'll be the guys hanging at the braai

Now we're talking. The earlier you arrive the drunker you get. Makes slow a benefit

You might need to wait a bit

I'll make myself visible. I'll be the slow guy on a commin Trek 29er wearing the muscle shirt...if you see it you'll know what I'm talking about

Yes, yes, NB Yes!