Sorry to hear that bud.
Back in 2018, the weekend after completing my first full IM (which was in April) I ran a club training run of 21km and I was so far back that I though to myself that there was no way I was going to achieve a Bill Rowan. I subsequently sold my entry for substitution. I still clearly remember sitting on the couch Comrades morning watching everyone on the tellie and thinking to myself that my legs were in great shape and I wish i didn't sell my entry as at worst I would at least still have finished. Nevertheless, roll on 6 years and life has happened and I haven't been able to enter the big C since. Just some food for thought from personal experience. Don't be to hard on yourself and know that there is still plenty of time.
