I have an idea for a new thread...

[Sammajoor]

PMS...

[small h]

[small h]

Apple's latest product.............. the I-Bum.

 

 

I see your I-Bum and raise you a Sponge-Bum

 

[Sammajoor]

the new I Cookie..

[Sammajoor]

A clever husband

 

A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for some important guests..

The wife was very excited about this and wanted everything to be perfect. At the very last minute, she realized that she didn`t have any snails for the

dinner party, so she asked her husband to run down to the beach with the bucket to gather some snails.

 

Very grudgingly he agreed. He took the bucket, walked out the door, down the steps, and out to the beach. As he was collecting the snails, he noticed a

beautiful woman strolling alongside the water just a little further down the beach. He kept thinking to himself, "Wouldn`t it be great if she would even

just come down and talk to me?" He went back to gathering the snails. All of a sudden he looked up, and the beautiful woman was standing right over him.

They started talking and she invited him back to her place.

 

They ended up spending the night together. At seven o`clock the next morning he woke up and exclaimed, "Oh no!!! My wife`s dinner party!!!" He gathered

all his clothes, put them on real fast, grabbed his bucket, and ran out the door. He ran down the beach all the way to his apartment. He ran up the

stairs of his apartment. He was in such a hurry that when he got to the top of the stairs, he dropped the bucket of snails.

 

There were snails all down the stairs. The door opened just then, with a very angry wife standing in the door way wondering where he`s been all this time. He looked at the snails all down the steps, then he looked at her,

then back at the snails and said, "Come on guys, we`re almost there!!"

[patches]

http://pic.epicfail.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/abercrombie-fitch-win-the-situation.jpg

[patches]

http://pic.epicfail.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/bathroom-conversation-fail.jpg

[patches]

http://artoftrolling.files.wordpress.com/2011/08/chatroulette-trolling-untitled74.jpg

[Stretch]

http://pic.epicfail.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/abercrombie-fitch-win-the-situation.jpg

it always amazes me how crap like jersey shore can carry on for multiple seasons while really good shows only last 1 or a maximum of 2

Edited August 31, 2011 by Stretch

[Sammajoor]

Road Rage

[small h]

[Tumbleweed]

This is what I'm playing with at my desk today…

 

[Sammajoor]

Koos werk by n dokter as skoonmaker. Dokter vra Koos moet n ogie oor sy pasiente hou want hy moet uitgaan.

Volgende dag vra Dokter vir Koos" en hoe het dit gegaan?"

Koos: Daar was 3 pasiente een het gehoes en ek het hom Benylin gegee"

Dokter:" goed so Koos, en die ander?

Koos:" die ander pasient het gekla oor allergie en ek het hom Allergex gegee" Dokter:" en die laaste pasient ?".

" Dit was n vrou, sy het ingekom, kaal uit getrek en op die ondersoektafel gaan Le en gese" ek het vier jaar laas n man gesien".

Dokter:" O, bliks@m Koos en wat doen jy toe ?"

Koos:" en toe gooi ek EyeGene in haar oe"

[Jakkals]

WHAT A COINCIDENCE!!!!

 

 

A chicken farmer went to a local bar.... Sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne..

 

The woman perks up and says, 'How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne,too!'

 

'What a coincidence' the farmer says. 'This is a special day for me.... I am celebrating'

 

'This is a special day for me too, I am also celebrating!' says the woman.

 

'What a coincidence!' says the farmer! As they clinked glasses the man asked, 'What are you celebrating?'

 

'My husband and I have been trying to have a child and today my gynecologist told me that I am pregnant!'

 

'What a coincidence,' says the man. 'I'm a chicken farmer and for years all of my hens were infertile, but today they are all laying fertilized eggs.'

 

'That's great!' says the woman. 'How did your chickens become fertile?'

 

'I used a different cock,' he replied.

 

The woman smiled and said, 'What a coincidence.'

Edited September 1, 2011 by Jakkals

[Super_mil]

I woke up this morning, got dressed and went in the kitchen where my wife was already fixing breakfast.

 

I looked to see what she was cooking and I see one of my socks in the frying pan.

 

"What are you doing?" I asked her.

 

She said "I'm doing what you asked me to do last night when you came to bed very drunk," she replied.

 

Completely puzzled, I walked away thinking to myself ,"I don't remember asking her to cook my sock..."

[small h]