Advice that I got from a divorce lawyer, "get an accountant." Balance all the books. Agree the split together. Either 50/50 or 40/60 or 40/40/20 (for your child) or what ever. Work out the cash payouts for both partners. (remember be unemotional here, you are dissolving a business partnership, not trying to screw each other one last time). Negotiate how this will be settled. Be vary wary of drawing money against your pension fund. Rather give her the cash value of the difference or give her assets to this value. ie car, boats, bicycles ext. Determine who has custody of the child and how much this is worth. If you get custody, she will have to pay maintenance and visa versa. If he is in a university residence, a trust fund can be created in which BOTH parties pay maintenance. Document the agreement. This is where you will need that lawyer. Make sure it is air tight, and if you can walk away with no further financial responsibilities towards her, even better. Separate, walk away and forgive and forget. DO NOT think you can save what is essentially over. (I have a friend that had break up sex with his ex and now has another child from it).
