Complaining without offering a solution

[Chris NewbyFraser]

Our world is filled with enormous expectations, created by over-zealous marketing and messaging. Creating and feeding upon those expectations are a gazillion folk who want to fulfill those expectations and make a buck at the same time. Very often these folk fall short of meeting the expectations we have (but that reason is a topic all on it's own and not the subject of my grumble).

 

So.. we have a negative experience and want to see this changed so that it becomes a positive experience. Thanks to the opportunity afforded us by chat rooms, we often voice this experience as a complaint, a whinge. We whine - a lot. In the back of our mind is the hope that the perpetrator of the bad experience will respond and fix the problem. Maybe they won't, or cannot.

 

But what if the perpetrator does not know how to fix things but is willing to? Has our complaint helped this person create a better experience or has it resulted in a negative sulk because we just bitched one-sidedly to the broader community.

 

If we were to make constructive suggestions of how or what we would really like to see things done by the 'accused', wouldn't this be a way to help the guy fix the problem

 

Say and do something positive that will help the situation, it's too easy to complain, especially with the anonymity of a chat room.

 

 

[Patchelicious]

Positive criticism, is a very under utilized tool. Mostly because most people cannot criticize in a constructive way.

 

I have started implementing a new thought train of thought at the office, I encourage our managers to criticize our ideas, BUT they can only do so if they offer an alternative suggestion or a proposed improvement on the idea.

 

That's the important part, and like you say. Finding fault is easy, offering a solution is not.

[DJR]

The VERY BEST advice anyone ever gave me about complaining was this: Complain only to the person who has the power to DO something about your problem. If you complain to anyone else, it is just a whinge, you will ALWAYS be disappointed with the outcome.

[Patchelicious]

The VERY BEST advice anyone ever gave me about complaining was this: Complain only to the person who has the power to DO something about your problem. If you complain to anyone else, it is just a whinge, you will ALWAYS be disappointed with the outcome.

I like that! Makes such sense!

[P.A.K.]

The VERY BEST advice anyone ever gave me about complaining was this: Complain only to the person who has the power to DO something about your problem. If you complain to anyone else, it is just a whinge, you will ALWAYS be disappointed with the outcome.

that's good advice. Especially in the work place. I've seen how one vocal unhappy person can influence colleagues

[Big Ray]

The problem is when one complains you come across negative and that breads negativity, people like to have a good moan, we seem to see it a support group when people moan with us.

 

I really like this thread, let's put a challenge down let's strive to be positive about everything for 1 week and see how it goes.

[No Hare]

Please let me be the first voice of negativity.

 

The only people that adhere to this teaching of Tony Robbins is bosses and supervisors that is trying to cover their own short comings and get a ego rush when they utter the words "give me a solution".

[webcast]

Our daily news is also filled with negativity hence we live it.

[HappyMartin]

Sometimes we complain not in order to fix things but to warn our friends and so help them avoid dealing with poor products and or service.

[PygaSchmyga]

Maybe as SAFFAS we just like to b#$cth and moan?  Could it not be a cultural thing of ours? Admittedly not the most attractive trait, but we seem to be quite good at it.  Or am I now being a glass half empty?

[Chris NewbyFraser]

As the originator of this lithread, I reserve the right to complain. I am unhappy. I would be a lot happier if we could start beating the Kiwi's.And NO, I don't have a solution to this problem.

[Big Ray]

It is world cup time after all so perhaps it's not all together unrealistic that we can beat them their record isn't all that good in world cups, besides they also have an ageing side, something to be positive about.

[Patchelicious]

Please let me be the first voice of negativity.

 

The only people that adhere to this teaching of Tony Robbins is bosses and supervisors that is trying to cover their own short comings and get a ego rush when they utter the words "give me a solution".

Maybe it's the other way around, maybe its people who look for and implement solutions thereby creating an improvement that grow their careers and become management.

[KingTJ]

As the originator of this lithread, I reserve the right to complain. I am unhappy. I would be a lot happier if we could start beating the Kiwi's.And NO, I don't have a solution to this problem.

Get a better coach....would be the start of your solution , make better team selections would take it further.....stop kicking the ball away (would probably the easiest start)....see there is always a solution you just have to dig a little bit deeper;p

[No Hare]

Maybe it's the other way around, maybe its people who look for and implement solutions thereby creating an improvement that grow their careers and become management.

Maybe you are a good person, responsible, a adult, have leadership abilities, good human interaction- and business sense: a good boss. Maybe you work in an environment were professionalism, honour, respect are the bases for all your actions.

 

You work in the private sector .  

[Patchelicious]

Maybe you are a good person, responsible, a adult, have leadership abilities, good human interaction- and business sense: a good boss. Maybe you work in an environment were professionalism, honour, respect are the bases for all your actions.

 

You work in the private sector .  

By choice, you have that same choice...