make me smile

[Tjokkits]

in hospital with a nose job

 

please post some funnies i need to laugh

[TitusTi]

go to www.explosm.net

[TNT1]

c&h... yeah...

[amateur]

A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees.<?: prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

 "I don't want to know," the child said, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't tell me."

Confused, the father asked what was wrong.

The boy sobbed, "When I was six, I got the " There's no Easter Bunny " speech.

At seven, I got the " There's no Tooth Fairy " speech.

When I was eight, you hit me with the " There's no Santa " speech.

If you're going to tell me that grown-ups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for."

[AndreZA]

HUMOR FOR LEXOPHILES  LOVERS OF WORDS;

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
 
Police were called to a day care where a 3 year old was resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?  He's all right now.

The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
 
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
 
When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
 
The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was  a small medium at large.
 
A thief who stole a calendar got 12 months.
 
A thief fell & broke his leg in wet cement.  He became a hardened criminal.
 
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
 
The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
 
A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
 
A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.
 
A will is a dead giveaway.
 
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

 A backward poet writes inverse.

In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.

A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft & I'll show you A-flat miner.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulting in Linoleum Blownapart.
 
You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
           
A calendar's days are numbered.

A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine. ('Taint none of it mine lately!!)

A boiled egg is hard to beat.
 
He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
             
Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
 
When you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
          
When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
        
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
      
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
          
Acupuncture: a jab well done.

 

[TNT1]

http://www.failblog.org

 

[Dirtbreath]

[Sean Badenhorst]

 

in hospital with a nose job

 

please post some funnies i need to laugh

 

Now that your nose is employed there, might as well check if they have jobs for the rest of you? At least you already have a foot in the door...

 

[TNT1]

 

 

TNT12008-08-29 07:06:03

[Tjokkits]

in hospital with a nose job

 

please post some funnies i need to laugh

Now that your nose is employed there' date=' might as well check if they have jobs for the rest of you? At least you already have a foot in the door...
[/quote']

 

 

 

my nose decided this is not a good place to hang aroung

[Nancy Drew]

was this nose job cosmetic or did someone bliksem you?

[Tjokkits]

was this nose job cosmetic or did someone bliksem you?

 

no i bliksemed off my bike and landed on my head, ended up with deviated septum

[Jackes]

was this nose job cosmetic or did someone bliksem you?

 

no i bliksemed off my bike and landed on my head' date=' ended up with deviated septum

[/quote']

luckily not ended up with a deviated rectum...

[Gman1834]

 

in hospital with a nose job

 

please post some funnies i need to laugh

 

what is next a hand job?

 

[Tjokkits]

in hospital with a nose job

 

please post some funnies i need to laugh

what is next a hand job?

 

definately a boob job

[Nancy Drew]

was this nose job cosmetic or did someone bliksem you?

 

no i bliksemed off my bike and landed on my head' date=' ended up with deviated septum

[/quote']

luckily not ended up with a deviated rectum...

 

ROFLOL!!!!

 

shame Tjokkits... at least you can fix it (at the medical aids expense)... when I bliksemed onto my face and broke my nose my septum wasn't 'deviated enough'.. the result, medical aid won't pay to fix it and I have a horrible skew nose