Disappointed in coach Swen Lauer - swenlauer.com

[Imploder]

Swen Lauer UCI Certified Coach just got tweeted - (What's an Asshat?):

 

 

[Eddy Gordo]

ok foolproof test to see if he's reading this or not. If he's following this thread, he will probably stop responding to me(very quick turnaround btw). If he isn't following this thread, then let's see how far down the rabbit hole we can go (to be dead honest, I am a bit short of inspriation so any hints welcome).

 

Hi Swen,

 

I got recommended for your coaching services as a UCI accredited coach. I have got a ticket for the epic next year and would like to take it seriously. I am looking at putting in 20-25hours a week training at peak time. I'm an ok rider, normally finish in the top 3rd of marathon races but have never taken on a stage race like this before.

 

what services could you offer and pricing?

 

steve

 

Hi Steven

 

I heard your name before. Yes, I can help you. I can offer a monthly training program provided on Training Peaks.

 

I charge ZAR 1000 or ZAR 1300 GYM and CYCLING per month . There is also a fee for TrainingPeaks (base fee) and the annual planing of ZAR 1200.

 

You would get your TP every Monday, designed or your needs. The Gym program I provide on I Muscle app.

 

20 to 25 hours is more than enough. Is your Partner in the same fitness level and how old are you?

 

Let me know and we can talk more specific.

 

Right now I am oversees. I'll be back in SA in October. I am based in Stellenbosch.

 

 

Kind regards / Mit freundlichen Gruessen

 

Swen Lauer

 

Swen,

 

Thanks for the speedy response, I was starting to worry that with winter coming I would miss the boat and before long it would be spring and I am behind schedule.

 

I don't like going to gym. My dad used to manage one when I was growing up and we hardly ever saw him with his work schedule. They all smell the same, I actually hate the gym. Surely the best training for mtb is to mtb?

 

I'm not sure if i would want the training schedule the whole way through. I'm happy to get the first month, use it for 3 months and then get another one etc.. That would be cheaper for me, and easier for you? My partner is similar to me, we would just train together.

 

thanks

Steve

 

Hi Steven

 

If you looking for a training style like you described, you don't need me. You would wast your money. A professional TP is structured in phase etc. and I don't offer a month TP, doesn't work for athletes/riders.

 

I am keen to guide you if you looking for real help to achieve your goals

 

You can contact me any time

 

 

Ride on, Swen

 

 

 

ok,

 

I'm not really familiar with training programs before. do you maybe offer a Swen 'lite' service? It would be quite cool if I could say you were coaching me, but you don't really have to send me that many programs the whole time. Or just send me ones of the other guys so I can kind of see what's ballpark?

 

I'm in cape town, it rains a lot now. so it's not like I'm going to be able to do XYZ exactly when I plan it anyway.

 

enjoy europe,

steve

You should let him bite for a full package up to the epic

Then refer him to this thread saying you have your doubts about sven lauer the uci mtb bmx wine2wales fnb coach

[MarcL]

 

UPDATE 6

 

It appears progress might be made again (Although under the threat of Twitter and UCI)

 

Swen Lauer is offering to pay back €300 based on the fact that I pulled out of a 6 month contract.

Where I feel he is missing the point its it was a monthly contract that I paid for 6 month in advance... 

 

So by his math:

"My refund of Euro 600 will be

 

- Euro 100 Base fee

- Euro 100 1st month

- Euro 100 deposit

 

EURO 300 / ZAR 4092 refund"

 

But by my math he is taking €300 for a 2 week training program. I must be in the wrong business as thats pretty good money. (And what's a Base fee?)

 

I am willing to pay his deposit and even for the first month as I did get a 2 week program...

 

​Time will tell if I actually get the money this time?

 

Stand by....

 

UPDATE 6B

 

After your many comments, I have changed my tune and won't accept his payoff...

 

After some digging, it appears his €100 Base fee is to connect me to Training Peaks - Here's the thing, I was already on Training Peaks but more importantly it only cost $20 per month per athlete and if you a "Coach" its $50 per month for unlimited athletes. So once again €100 Base fee is just another scam...

 

I still have my doubts I will see a single €, but lets stay positive and see what happens.

 

Thanks again for the support!

[Thor Buttox]

Swen Lauer UCI Certified Coach just got tweeted - (What's an Asshat?):

An asshat is an assh--e when the auto-erection works too fast.

 

Edit: not again... Correction

[Captain Fastbastard Mayhem]

An asshat is an assh--e when the auto-erection works too fast.

 

Edit: not again... Correction

asshat 

One who has their head up their ass. Thus wearing their ass as a hat. Asshat

[Thor Buttox]

asshat One who has their head up their ass. Thus wearing their ass as a hat. Asshat

An, nee, vok... You learn something new every day. How is Swen supposed to understand that? He's German, where Funk You, just sounds like Thank You?

[BarHugger]

Spot the similarities:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

........really only one.......

 

 

Both are comedians.

[Jigghead]

ok foolproof test to see if he's reading this or not. If he's following this thread, he will probably stop responding to me(very quick turnaround btw). If he isn't following this thread, then let's see how far down the rabbit hole we can go (to be dead honest, I am a bit short of inspriation so any hints welcome). 

 

Hi Swen,

 

I got recommended for your coaching services as a UCI accredited coach. I have got a ticket for the epic next year and would like to take it seriously. I am looking at putting in 20-25hours a week training at peak time. I'm an ok rider, normally finish in the top 3rd of marathon races but have never taken on a stage race like this before.

 

what services could you offer and pricing?

 

steve

 

Hi Steven

 

I heard your name before. Yes, I can help you. I can offer a monthly training program provided on Training Peaks.

 

I charge ZAR 1000 or ZAR 1300 GYM and CYCLING per month . There is also a fee for TrainingPeaks (base fee) and the annual planing of ZAR 1200.

 

You would get your TP every Monday, designed or your needs. The Gym program I provide on I Muscle app. 

 

20 to 25 hours is more than enough. Is your Partner in the same fitness level and how old are you? 

 

Let me know and we can talk more specific.

 

Right now I am oversees. I'll be back in SA in October. I am based in Stellenbosch.

 

 

Kind regards / Mit freundlichen Gruessen

 

Swen Lauer

 

Swen, 

 

Thanks for the speedy response, I was starting to worry that with winter coming I would miss the boat and before long it would be spring and I am behind schedule.

 

I don't like going to gym. My dad used to manage one when I was growing up and we hardly ever saw him with his work schedule. They all smell the same, I actually hate the gym. Surely the best training for mtb is to mtb?

 

I'm not sure if i would want the training schedule the whole way through. I'm happy to get the first month, use it for 3 months and then get another one etc.. That would be cheaper for me, and easier for you? My partner is similar to me, we would just train together.

 

thanks

Steve

 

Hi Steven

 

If you looking for a training style like you described, you don't need me. You would wast your money. A professional TP is structured in phase etc. and I don't offer a month TP, doesn't work for athletes/riders. 

 

I am keen to guide you if you looking for real help to achieve your goals

 

You can contact me any time

 

 

Ride on, Swen

 

 

 

ok,

 

I'm not really familiar with training programs before. do you maybe offer a Swen 'lite' service? It would be quite cool if I could say you were coaching me, but you don't really have to send me that many programs the whole time. Or just send me ones of the other guys so I can kind of see what's ballpark?

 

I'm in cape town, it rains a lot now. so it's not like I'm going to be able to do XYZ exactly when I plan it anyway.

 

enjoy europe,

steve

Instead of asking for the 'Swen lite', perhaps you should have requested a 'Lauer' version?

[Spez247]

UPDATE 6B

 

After your many comments, I have changed my tune and won't accept his payoff...

 

After some digging, it appears his €100 Base fee is to connect me to Training Peaks - Here's the thing, I was already on Training Peaks but more importantly it only cost $20 per month per athlete and if you a "Coach" its $50 per month for unlimited athletes. So once again €100 Base fee is just another scam...

 

I still have my doubts I will see a single €, but lets stay positive and see what happens.

 

Thanks again for the support!

Really hope you get your FULL refund. What this Buffon isn't taking into consideration, is your time and effort, into getting a reply. As mentioned, he bailed, not you; so it's 600.00, not 300.00. But that's just me. From his replies, this oke isn't fit to polish your shoes, let alone get you trained up.

[No Hare]

I would like to know this as well

mostly cut & paste, cut & paste

[No Hare]

This Swen Lauer UCI certified MTB & BMX cycling coach l Virgin Active Ambassador Stellenbosch, South Africa, does he own or rent property in Stellenbosch?

 

It will be interesting to see how committed he is in staying in ZA.

[KingTJ]

And what about all the wasted time running after Swen Lauer UCI Certified Coach and the fact he tried to screw the Op, in my books that equals a full refund.

 

What kind of person is Swen Lauer UCI Certified Coach that at this late stage he's still not in damage control mode, he's still trying to squeeze the up for his bucks. Sociopath perhaps?

And what about the other people he screwed?

 

Either way UCI needs to hear about his modus operandi that's for sure.

I have already written to the UCI about Swen Lauer UCI Certified Coach, and laid a complaint directing them to the hub...

[Boerklong]

Pay back the maanie Swen Lauer UCI certified MTB & BMX cycling coach l Virgin Active Ambassador Stellenbosch, South Africa,

[eddy]

 Just remind him who won the war....in fact, both of them.

[Boerklong]

Otherwise we march

[Guest notmyname]

Maybe Swen Lauer UCI certified MTB & BMX cycling coach l Virgin Active Ambassador Stellenbosch, South Africa, has damaged his keyboard with coffee while reading this hilarious thread. Now he can't answer for his actions.