I was a casual smoker, mostly a pipe smoker, with quite an expensive collection of pipes. When the religion became a nagger or a monster (which happens in most cases) I turned to cigarettes for a while and rewarded myself every now and then with a Cohiba or Montecristo or a tin of cigarillos. I could kind of manage my smoking habit. Most of the times pipe smoking was quite enjoyable. I nearly perfected a Clint Eastwood "stare you down" with a cigarillo clenched between his teeth. Who remembers those almost iconic scenes? 6 years ago I was working away on contract with a chain smoking colleague. Until then I was chasing the wind in Jonkershoek like a madman. I was fit (but smoking). I came back, joining up with my regular mtb mates (without cycling for a few months, relying only on pure muscle memory), and as we got closer to Jonkershoek I heard this funny sound. I asked my buddy next to me what the hell makes this suffocating screech! He burst out laughing telling me it was ...., me!! ****!! ME!!?? I told him about my 3 month chain-smoking holiday, when he replied "just go google Allen Carr when back home". So I did. That very same evening. I booked my seat on the very next seminar in Cape Town. The presenter (an ex dentist) offers you crap plastic coffee, 5 eat-sum-more biscuits, AND lots of smoke breaks (yeah, bring your smokes with!). My mind was already made up, even before coming to the seminar. BIG Bonus was Discovery (back)paid for the Allen Carr seminar, it wasnt cheap. I quit smoking for the following reasons: * Of which the most important was, - I was born healthy, which I have donated in free will to a unhealthy habit. It is not only unhealthy to me, but to every single one keeping company with me. I wanted to reclaim my good health back! * Intelligent design excluded an exhaust system from my body (unlike those lovely big Oshkosh trucks from years back, and most big and bright yellow toys with monster wheels, billowing black smoke into the air when them engines roar - oh how I love those upright chimneys!!) * Mr BAT, P Stuyvesant, P. Revere, the CAMELman, Peterson & Kapp, Savenelli, and the whole crew dont give a stinking **** about my health, nor contributing a cent to my medical aid for all the years of loyal investments I have made to them. I just paid for a smoke, and it went up in smoke! * It simply vrots! If i really want to vrot, I just go camping up in the desert for a few weeks. * Kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray! That sucks BIG time. Show me any smoker that loves licking an ashtray!? * In general smokers are inconsiderate. I have two pipes left (still with the same black vanilla tobacco of that July day 6 years ago), harmless together in the tobacco tin; - one sentimental, and one just absolute beautiful German design. Once a while I do open the holder for the vanilla aroma to escape, bringing back beautiful memories of many days and nights spent in the Namib.
