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Adverse analytical finding in recent mountain bike stage race


Tumbleweed

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Sure

 

Guy with a clipboard approached me, youngster, probably just a casual Epic staff member. Said "im sorry to disturb you sir, but you've been randomly selected for dope control".

I asked what this means, he tells me that I need to accompany him to the UCI trailer within 15 mins to submit a urine sample.

I quietly poop in my bibs.

He tells me i can relax and catch my breath and eat my woolworths meal, but he needs to stand with me and not allow me out of his sight. He keeps his distance.

I think he smells the poop.

I finish eating and walk with him to the UCI tent & trailer. Another arrogant guy approaches me and starts writing on a form on his clipboard, my name and race number etc. I say arrogant because he asks me to produce identification.

I just got off my bicycle after a near death epic experience, and when i say i dont have any on me, he starts interrogating me as to why not and where is it and how can i not have ID on me. I give him a mouthfull on why my driver's license wasn't a requirement for me to cycle the stage. Told him to get it from the race organizers...

 

I'm given a cup and told to accompany a security guard to the portaloo behind the trailer and produce a minimum of 60 - 90ml of urine while he watches me produce it. Feeling a lil weird at this point but ok...

I could easily have filled a 1.5 litre bottle, but hand the 90ml sippy cup to the guard while i expend the balance of my bladder's contents in the loo.

He appreciates the warmth of the cup.

 

He escorts me to the front of the trailer and i climb in and sit at a table across from an official who takes down all my details etc. I open a sealed polystyrene container with 2 bottles inside marked A and B. The official touches absolutely nothing, just instructs me on what to do. Fill bottle A up to a line, then seal it with the special lid, then place it in a bag then seal that too, then slot it back into it's slot in the box.Same for bottle B. Close and reseal the box and sign the completed form. A foreign chap assumably from the UCI pops his head in to greet me and asks if this is my 1st time at drug testing. I say yes, I'm not a UCI pro athlete so i knew nothing about the testing. He chuckles and leaves, then so do i.

 

What happened next was CSA contacting me on wednesday then the press release of yesterday. The 'process' in a nutshell...

 

Thanks very much,

 

Is'nt having to pee in front of someone else a violation of your right to privacy? I personally would refuse to.

 

I wasn't at Epic but I saw the dope crowd on the finish line live cam, and to my they looked pretty similar to the schoolkid's on the other side of the finish shoot. Didn't appear to be very professional and looked like random locals...

 

The reason I asked is to hear how secure their testing procedure is. I mean, this is SA full of corruption and what if, just if the sample wasn't even yours, or got mixed up or what ever. Who really knows what happens to those boxes after you sealed them...

Edited by Brighter-Lights
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wait, were you wearing white kit? always had arm warmers on? big "guns"? i think i remember you....

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while i expend the balance of my bladder's contents in the loo.

 

To all reading this, never have done a dope test.......DON'T "expend the balance".

 

Sometimes the urine's Ph is not right and you have to give a second sample. An empty bladder then means you have to sip on creamsoda for an hour or two just to get it filled again.

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wait, were you wearing white kit? always had arm warmers on? big "guns"? i think i remember you....

 

Yes, that was me...

What i really like to wear is in a pic on page 8 or 9 of the thread...

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oh flip. We had a couple chats on route. not sure what to say now.... :whistling:

IN THE BEGINNING OF THE THREAD I WAS CHIRPING ALL THE BETTER THEN WHEN THEY PUT A NAME AND I REALISED I HAD CHUCKLED ON THE HUB A FEW TIMES AT HIS POSTS THINGS CHANGED :whistling: :whistling: FUNNY HOW THAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PUT A FACE TO A STORY

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oh flip. We had a couple chats on route. not sure what to say now.... :whistling:

 

Uuuuh, see you at Epic 2014...? :ph34r:

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Sure....

 

 

He appreciates the warmth of the cup.....

 

 

 

So funny that, I almost let slip a urine sample of my own!

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IN THE BEGINNING OF THE THREAD I WAS CHIRPING ALL THE BETTER THEN WHEN THEY PUT A NAME AND I REALISED I HAD CHUCKLED ON THE HUB A FEW TIMES AT HIS POSTS THINGS CHANGED :whistling: :whistling: FUNNY HOW THAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PUT A FACE TO A STORY

 

 

so true!!!!

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id still like too see what happens with regard to him being named and shamed without being notified, surely there is some defamation of character there

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So what's the moral of the story? Do the back-of-packers now also need to get TUE's, even if they're nowhere near to being competitive?

 

I am a fat funrider, if I do races I start at the back and stop at all the waterpoints. I have never bothered to establish whether anything in my chronic medication is banned, or anything in any other medication I may take from time to time. Does that make me an evil doper?

 

If you don't get caught, you are just a normal fun rider, like all of us.

If you do get caught, then YES, you are an evil doper and by implication (ala Swiss), a liar too!

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I'd be very interested to know how many of us here (excluding those racing) have ever been tested at an event they were participating in as a fun ride....

 

Anyone?

 

I'm not holdin my breath but maybe I'll be surprised....

Or how many of the back markers were tested. Choice of 1200 riders!
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