So my 9 year old was in a hit and run on Monday :(

[Andreas_187]

Sounds like you did the right thing. Well done.

[Popit]

Well done Sir !!

I think you have dealt with this in an exemplary manner .

 

Hopefully the young lady has really learnt from this and makes the necessary changes to her driving , and approach to life going forward .

[Dirkitech]

Ok so we had a great weekend at the dam sailing swimming and relaxing - much needed for the whole family.

 

We had a pow-wow early last week with a mate of ours who's a judge. he gave us some sobering stats regarding courts, court cases and of course what happens statistically to 18 year old stewardesses when arrested. On his recommendation we had a sit-down with her and her parents about the accident and the way forward. We decided to not open a hit and run case - to this we attached absolutely no strings, as we believe that she genuinely had a fright AND learned a couple of BIG life lessons as well as showing true remorse over the whole saga.

 

Next on the list were costs involved - even after the (good) medical aid paid out there are still at least R5000 to R6000 outstanding. They will cover this shortfall. They will also cover therapy for our kids. The driver must also attend both therapy (she is very close to losing her marbles over the accident) and do community service with an ambulance crew to see first hand the damage negligent driving causes.

 

She will also be formally apologizing to my daughter for the accident.

 

I think everyone may just be better off after this. It was the best solution that was 'fair' to everyone. 

Just curious regarding the bolded part - what happened with the indifference and lying to your face on the day? Did true remorse set in, but only many days later?

[Pants Boy]

 

Pants Boy, you are a good man and an example to this world

 

 

Not always so sure about that - I do try and do 'the right thing' but I'm full of faults 

 

Any chance you can get a copy of the security camera footage, with number plates and faces blurred out, so that we can get people in Pretoria and in our own suburb to take their driving more seriously?

 

Nothing like video footage in your own back-yard to shake you to your senses? Share it with high-school kids as well before they start driving.

 

The security company won't allow me to distribute.

 

Just curious regarding the bolded part - what happened with the indifference and lying to your face on the day? Did true remorse set in, but only many days later?

 

I think she was in shock on the day - no, I can guarantee that she was. And as most people in SA she was more afraid of the 'consequences' of getting arrested than stopping to help. It was a confluence of shock and fear that made her drive away and try to get away with lying. She has come 100% clean on what happened on the day (this time her words reflected eyewitness accounts as well as video) and she hasn't spoken to either witnesses or seen the footage. That helped convince me that we're doing the right thing.

 

One never knows, going into a meeting like this, what the other party's reaction is going to be.  I'm just glad it's over (bar the apology and therapy) and we're all relatively unscathed.

[Bateleur1]

Well done.  Traffic accident convictions are a huge problem in SA courts.  I think you got very sound advice from your friend. An old lawyer friend of ours also always said the best solution is an out of court solution.  Always better to resolve things before having to go to court.  At the end of the day you want this lady to learn out of the experience and the community service with the ambulance will be the best thing.

[Geronimo]

Ok so we had a great weekend at the dam sailing swimming and relaxing - much needed for the whole family.

 

We had a pow-wow early last week with a mate of ours who's a judge. he gave us some sobering stats regarding courts, court cases and of course what happens statistically to 18 year old stewardesses when arrested. On his recommendation we had a sit-down with her and her parents about the accident and the way forward. We decided to not open a hit and run case - to this we attached absolutely no strings, as we believe that she genuinely had a fright AND learned a couple of BIG life lessons as well as showing true remorse over the whole saga.

 

Next on the list were costs involved - even after the (good) medical aid paid out there are still at least R5000 to R6000 outstanding. They will cover this shortfall. They will also cover therapy for our kids. The driver must also attend both therapy (she is very close to losing her marbles over the accident) and do community service with an ambulance crew to see first hand the damage negligent driving causes.

 

She will also be formally apologizing to my daughter for the accident.

 

I think everyone may just be better off after this. It was the best solution that was 'fair' to everyone. 

 

Well done          so much better than taking a harde gat attitude.

[Long Wheel Base]

@Pants Boy, well done. I think you have been very mature and clever about this. I think the outcome is a lot better the way you have gone about it.

[Mntboy]

Not always so sure about that - I do try and do 'the right thing' but I'm full of faults

 

 

The security company won't allow me to distribute.

 

 

I think she was in shock on the day - no, I can guarantee that she was. And as most people in SA she was more afraid of the 'consequences' of getting arrested than stopping to help. It was a confluence of shock and fear that made her drive away and try to get away with lying. She has come 100% clean on what happened on the day (this time her words reflected eyewitness accounts as well as video) and she hasn't spoken to either witnesses or seen the footage. That helped convince me that we're doing the right thing.

 

One never knows, going into a meeting like this, what the other party's reaction is going to be. I'm just glad it's over (bar the apology and therapy) and we're all relatively unscathed.

This is such good outcome for everybody. Hopefully this 18 year old will be sharing what she learns with her friends and family and some members of her immediate support structures might have their eyes opened to the consequences of negligent/reckless driving.

 

Good on you for showing her a bit of grace. The world is sorely lacking such examples.

 

Sent from my SM-J250F using Tapatalk

[AdamA]

WOW!! Well done!

[SuperDooperSnooper]

Very good outcome for all.

 

@Pants Boy, I salute you, Sir! You are truly an example to all as to how a situation like this should be handled.

[Gav1]

 

very pragmatic and mature approach. You managed to achieve maximum affect that perhaps the 'system' would not have managed to achieve (the driver would have learnt from this experience).

 

Good on you for not simply dropping the issue after the chat with your judge friend (as many may have done as it can be demoralising).

 

moot point - i wonder if she would have reflected on what she did and have said change of heart if she managed to get away? 

 

we'll never know and doesn't matter i suppose, in the end things worked out okay in the circumstances. 

[Puncher]

I've found this very interesting - as my one kid rides to school, its not far but there are three road crossings,one of which is a pedestrian crossing. I don't think I'd  have the same level of forgiveness to someone who lied, denied and got her dad to try and sway your frame of mind during a traumatic incident. If a mini bus taxi were involved would the outcome be different I thought?

[Slowbee]

Any updates Pants Boy ?

[Pants Boy]

Any updates Pants Boy ?

 

Kid's doing great - therapy is working but she hasn't gotten back on her bike yet. Driver came away crying from her ride-along in the plus-bus (ambulance) as the first scene they attended was a hit and run (motorbike but the point was amply made)

[Chingy182]

 

 

 

I think she was in shock on the day - no, I can guarantee that she was. And as most people in SA she was more afraid of the 'consequences' of getting arrested than stopping to help. It was a confluence of shock and fear that made her drive away and try to get away with lying. 

 

I can understand the shock one must experience in such circumstances.

 

What I often read in these cases is once the driver is caught/made to return to the scene of the crime how they often turn aggressive.

 

My mind was just flashing back to the guy on the R27 west coast road (nogals in his tankwa trek top) that hit a bunch, returned 15mins later and started looking for fights just about.

 

This attitude just blows my mind

[Robbie Stewart]

I can understand the shock one must experience in such circumstances.

 

What I often read in these cases is once the driver is caught/made to return to the scene of the crime how they often turn aggressive.

 

My mind was just flashing back to the guy on the R27 west coast road (nogals in his tankwa trek top) that hit a bunch, returned 15mins later and started looking for fights just about.

 

This attitude just blows my mind

 

When did this occur? I missed that one. I drove up the R27 to Melkbos on Sunday, and again realised that despite the enormous verge, I would not ride that road. I ride up Otto du Plessis to Koeberg / Duynefontein when I go up that way.