New Zealand - The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

[Stretch]

Don't patronize me please. There is no bubble around me, i know exactly what my socio economic position is relative to the majority of the population of our country.

 

 

 

Oooh... Shots fired....by nature of where you are and how you choose to live there is a bubble around you. There's no getting around that. By choosing a private school and a secure estate etc etc you he stepped into that bubble as much as you want to believe you haven't. It's not being patronising... But you said you don't live like a king... But to many both locally and abroad you/we do... And that's my point

[Mamil]

Much did I rage when young

Being by the world oppressed.

But now with flattering tongue

It speeds the parting guest.

WB Yeats

 

Oooh... Shots fired....by nature of where you are and how you choose to live there is a bubble around you. There's no getting around that. By choosing a private school and a secure estate etc etc you he stepped into that bubble as much as you want to believe you haven't. It's not being patronising... But you said you don't live like a king... But to many both locally and abroad you/we do... And that's my point

[Mamil]

It looks like a might have some flexibility in terms of where I would be able to live and work if I were to pull the trigger on a move like this. 

 

I have read here and elsewhere that south island is beautiful but very wet.

 

I don't think I'd like to live in a major city - perhaps a smaller town or semi-urban area. I would like there to be enough sunshine / dry weather to allow outdoor activities like hiking and road / mtb. 

 

A good cricket club might be nice too to play some social cricket and make new mates.

 

Maybe a good question to those in NZ might be where would you personally avoid living?

Edited October 26, 2018 by Mamil

[MTBeer]

It looks like a might have some flexibility in terms of where I would be able to live and work if I were to pull the trigger on a move like this. 

 

I have read here and elsewhere that south island is beautiful but very wet.

 

I don't think I'd like to live in a major city - perhaps a smaller town or semi-urban area. I would like there to be enough sunshine / dry weather to allow outdoor activities like hiking and road / mtb. 

 

A good cricket club might be nice too to play some social cricket and make new mates.

 

Maybe a good question to those in NZ might be where would you personally avoid living?

asked a mate in Auckland where he would live if he had a choice. He said Tauranga or Nelson.

[Wayne Potgieter]

If I could pick anywhere in Nz to live other than Auckland (which I really like) it would be Nelson.

[davetapson]

If I could pick anywhere in Nz to live other than Auckland (which I really like) it would be Nelson.

 

I know nothing about NZ yet, but Auckland is not shabby.

 

And that freedom thing, it counts.

 

Ironically, went down to the local marine reserve whilst arbing around getting to know the place, and who's poaching the sea-urchins (kina) and octopus?  Yep, the earlier inhabitants. Seems some things never change.  Asked them what they do with them.  'Eat them raw mate, or best on a slice of toast.  Here, try one.' So I've eaten raw, poached sea urchin within three days of arriving in the country...    

[Mamil]

Thanks for this - will investigate.

asked a mate in Auckland where he would live if he had a choice. He said Tauranga or Nelson.

 

 

If I could pick anywhere in Nz to live other than Auckland (which I really like) it would be Nelson.

 

Hey Stretch - in red below is the stuff that ought to be attracting the ire of your social conscience - one of the things about being a white South African, whether at home or abroad is that you get associated with this kind of unreconstructed nonsense. 

 

The thought that I might end up around a braai fire on the other side of the world listening to some expat Saffa expressing views like this is a scary one. Perhaps not quite as scary as the worry that my daughter will be home alone when the crowbar @ssh0les invade while I'm trying to get a PB up Suikerbossie, but it is a factor in the decision.

 

I know nothing about NZ yet, but Auckland is not shabby.

And that freedom thing, it counts.

 

Ironically, went down to the local marine reserve whilst arbing around getting to know the place, and who's poaching the sea-urchins (kina) and octopus?  Yep, the earlier inhabitants. Seems some things never change.  Asked them what they do with them.  'Eat them raw mate, or best on a slice of toast.  Here, try one.' So I've eaten raw, poached sea urchin within three days of arriving in the country...    

[Ramrod]

I asked the wife today what we would do differently. One thing was stay closer to friends. Socialise more with friends etc.  One thing is for sure there is no way I am doing that commute over the NH bridge into the city.

 

But the big thing is we said we would let my step daughters finish school first. That is still 2 years to go.............

Yeah I am replying to myself. They have put a number on the table now that is considerably more than what u was earning when I was there.  If this was 1,5-2 years in the future I would be there in a heartbeat!  The mind is in turmoil.

[Stretch]

Thanks for this - will investigate.

 

 

 

Hey Stretch - in red below is the stuff that ought to be attracting the ire of your social conscience - one of the things about being a white South African, whether at home or abroad is that you get associated with this kind of unreconstructed nonsense. 

 

The thought that I might end up around a braai fire on the other side of the world listening to some expat Saffa expressing views like this is a scary one. Perhaps not quite as scary as the worry that my daughter will be home alone when the crowbar @ssh0les invade while I'm trying to get a PB up Suikerbossie, but it is a factor in the decision.

 

hey Mamil...Personally, you wont find me sitting around a braai with saffas because I try my best to assimilate with the local culture as much as possible...and one of the best things about that is people dont stand around moaning about other racial or religious groups, or make blatant racial generalisations. Focus on the freedom and the future and leave the racial tension in SA

[intern]

Who is it that lives like a king in za. Certainly not me. I'm a middle aged professional person self employed and I certainly don't feel like there is much of my life that is kingly. I have 2 fairly nice bikes, a decent car, a bond on a modest house, a hospital plan, a child in a private school, access to spectacular places to ride my bikes and take photos with my expensive camera but life isn't easy. And I think I'm in a better position than the majority. My skin is white.

 

I do see some people living like kings around me but it really looks like a small minority. Most people I know are working flat out trying to build something. I'm not trying to be argumentative but your comments about you guys living like kings decades after :independance" (a framing of political events that makes me think you might wear a pith helmet) seem pretty out of touch from the middle class throne where I drop my after breakfast turd.

 

Ok maybe i am being a little argumentative.

 

I've just put another chunk of my royal wealth into security on my already fairly secure home to try and ameliorate some of the anxiety caused by a recwnt escalation of violent home invasion and car hijacking in the area.

 

I also have a window of opportunity in front of me to go to NZ and build something there for myself and my offspring. That won't be easy either but I can't help but feel that if I don't in 25 years time when I am an old man and even more curmudgeonly than I am mow that I will wish I'd made the move.

 

 

Got a maid, mate? How about a gardener?

[intern]

Who is it that lives like a king in za. Certainly not me. I'm a middle aged professional person self employed and I certainly don't feel like there is much of my life that is kingly. I have 2 fairly nice bikes, a decent car, a bond on a modest house, a hospital plan, a child in a private school, access to spectacular places to ride my bikes and take photos with my expensive camera but life isn't easy. And I think I'm in a better position than the majority. My skin is white.

 

I do see some people living like kings around me but it really looks like a small minority. Most people I know are working flat out trying to build something. I'm not trying to be argumentative but your comments about you guys living like kings decades after :independance" (a framing of political events that makes me think you might wear a pith helmet) seem pretty out of touch from the middle class throne where I drop my after breakfast turd.

 

Ok maybe i am being a little argumentative.

 

I've just put another chunk of my royal wealth into security on my already fairly secure home to try and ameliorate some of the anxiety caused by a recwnt escalation of violent home invasion and car hijacking in the area.

 

I also have a window of opportunity in front of me to go to NZ and build something there for myself and my offspring. That won't be easy either but I can't help but feel that if I don't in 25 years time when I am an old man and even more curmudgeonly than I am mow that I will wish I'd made the move.

 

Also, always a good idea to appreciate what you have, wherever you may be, rather than what you don't have.

[intern]

It looks like a might have some flexibility in terms of where I would be able to live and work if I were to pull the trigger on a move like this. 

 

I have read here and elsewhere that south island is beautiful but very wet.

 

I don't think I'd like to live in a major city - perhaps a smaller town or semi-urban area. I would like there to be enough sunshine / dry weather to allow outdoor activities like hiking and road / mtb. 

 

A good cricket club might be nice too to play some social cricket and make new mates.

 

Maybe a good question to those in NZ might be where would you personally avoid living?

 

I always strongly advocate provincial New Zealand - I live in a dorp far from anywhere. Affordable housing, excellent sense of community, lots of outdoor stuff on your, er, doorstep...and better weather, esp Nelson, Tauranga (I am 100km SE of Tauranga in Whakatane). I'd avoid anywhere on the west coast except maybe Raglan, anywhere south of Blenheim (too cold), Invercargill no thanks, Auckland's awesome if you are a bazillionaire, Hamilton is too central and too cold/rainy misty, but a nice town and is the centre of cycling, Taupo is beautiful but too cold for me...

[intern]

Thanks for this - will investigate.

 

 

 

Hey Stretch - in red below is the stuff that ought to be attracting the ire of your social conscience - one of the things about being a white South African, whether at home or abroad is that you get associated with this kind of unreconstructed nonsense. 

 

The thought that I might end up around a braai fire on the other side of the world listening to some expat Saffa expressing views like this is a scary one. Perhaps not quite as scary as the worry that my daughter will be home alone when the crowbar @ssh0les invade while I'm trying to get a PB up Suikerbossie, but it is a factor in the decision.

 

Uh, sorry, rubbish. The locals I know (and note how I do not stereotype the entire country, because how would I know) including my Maori mates, will say PRECISELY the same thing, except they won't be nearly as polite.

And we call 'em kina here, the sea urchins...

[intern]

 

Much did I rage when young

Being by the world oppressed.

But now with flattering tongue

It speeds the parting guest.

WB Yeats

 

 

For a literature buff, you sure take some things very literally, my liege ;-)

[hayleyearth]

Hello Hayley

You very quiet on here, how is the little one ?

 

"little"? she turns out to be a big girl

A 99 percentile in length - don't know where she gets that from, luckily only 50 percentile in weight.

 I am quiet because it takes a lot of time to raise a little one like this especially if you are preparing her to be a future QOM at TdF 

She is a VERY alert baby so sleeping time is quite a problem, for me that is THE biggest and only struggle we have with her. I am exclusively breastfeeding so I am eating for two and still constantly hungry which is something I didn't do/feel when I was pregnant. I am also constantly tired, exhausted is more suited and it is not due to the lack of sleep and many times I am considering going to formula so I can just have a bit more freedom and energy to do what I would like to (like ride more and run again). It is however scary to see her outgrow the clothes meant to fit her (3-6months as she is only 4 months old today), she is currently wearing 9 months old clothes sizes and to think it is my body alone feeding her growth - it is crazy to think.

 

 

I have been on the bike again a little - only 3 short rides.

And we took her riding too when we were in France when she was 2 months old...just over 30km done (Ile de Re).

 

She is a little character and keep us on our toes, we are quite scared of when she will start to speak words and ask questions and start to move herself around. She is very strong!

 

For me this has been the toughest time of my life thus far, I'll say a bit in my next post.

[hayleyearth]

Reading the last few posts about how it is living in NZ and compared to SA etc etc etc I thought I could add my 'new' view due to having our baby now...

 

In the last 4 months I have wanted to move home almost on a daily basis and if my partner would have let me go I would have spent some time at home with my parents with our baby - understandingly he has done all he can to prevent me to jump on a plane.

 

Both of us are in NZ alone - we have no other family here (well my sister is here now but she is still finding her own way so we see her very little and strangely not suited for the role I need someone to be). I miss having that mother/grandmother role that will come take the baby from your arms and change her nappy and feed her and put her to sleep during the day so I can take a shower and have something to eat or just rest a bit.

 

I wish we were living in South Africa so I could have a nanny that could come clean my house so I could maybe rest (not really sleep) while my baby is sleeping instead of doing the laundry, doing the dusting (or all the silent jobs) and then when baby is awake and fed and cleaned then give her a toy and in 10min do all the vacuuming while running back to baby 10 times to make sure she has not started eating the toy up.

 

I wish I had the family member or close friend that would invite me for a meal - this does not happen in NZ! Kiwi's don't even invite you to their house for a beer never mind a meal. I can remember as a child how many dinners or lunches we ate at my aunts or ouma.

 

My partner is (more needs to be) my friend, sibling, mother/father, ouma/oupa, nanny AND the father of our child AND my lover (and I need to be all this to him) and many times in the last 4 months we realized that we can not be all this for one another - every day we wake up though trying to be this for one another (he is better at it than me) but every night we go to be more exhausted than the day before because we have no village and I can tell you that once you have a baby you realise more than ever how much you need a support system just to keep sane. Life would have been way easier if we could just have that nanny and granny.

 

We came home the day she was born.

She has had every feed of her life with me.

I have witnessed every nappy change.

She has been every awakened moment with me in the same house.

I have had 4 hours of her life to myself (after I made sure she was asleep).

 

I can with confidence say that if I was in SA it would not have been like this. And the worse is everyday thus far I wish I was in SA but then I go walk with her in the stoller, just the two of us going 10km all over and I have NO fear, I take photos with my phone in public of us on the walk and not scared someone is seeing me and then would come take my phone - here I am free in that regard, but without 'a village' / or some support it is really something we as expats (with new babies especially) find very hard. (Talking about all my friends all around the world that has new babies too.)