I have an idea for a new thread...

[Lurch the stalker]

Hehehehee

 

I like the sound effect "Pssssst"

...and the "ping" of the spoke.

[Velouria]

Hehehehee

 

I like the sound effect "Pssssst"

 

Pfffffft also works...

 

 

(this was some road debris that flicked up and damaged by derailleur) 

[Lurch the stalker]

Pfffffft also works...

 

IMG_20161117_155234.jpg

 

(this was some road debris that flicked up and damaged by derailleur) 

Haha, "mystery object"

['Dale]

From FB

 

 

['Dale]

['Dale]

['Dale]

['Dale]

Okay.... last one, Souf Efri-kins

 

[MTBeer]

one of the contenders for the bad sex literary award -

 

“‘Anne,’ he says, stopping and looking down at me. I am pinned like wet washing with his peg. ‘Till now, I thought the sweetest sound I could ever hear was cows chewing grass. But this is better.’ He sways and we listen to the soft suck at the exact place we meet. Then I move and put all thoughts of livestock out of his head.”

 

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2016/nov/17/bad-sex-awards-shortlist-blue-peter-janet-ellis

Edited November 17, 2016 by MTBeer

[Captain Fastbastard Mayhem]

one of the contenders for the bad sex literary award -

 

“‘Anne,’ he says, stopping and looking down at me. I am pinned like wet washing with his peg. ‘Till now, I thought the sweetest sound I could ever hear was cows chewing grass. But this is better.’ He sways and we listen to the soft suck at the exact place we meet. Then I move and put all thoughts of livestock out of his head.”

 

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2016/nov/17/bad-sex-awards-shortlist-blue-peter-janet-ellis

Wow

[MTBeer]

apparently Morrissey won it last year for this gem -

 

– “the pained frenzy of his bulbous salutation extenuating his excitement as it whacked and smacked its way into every muscle of Eliza’s body except for the otherwise central zone”

[forkie]

one of the contenders for the bad sex literary award -

 

“‘Anne,’ he says, stopping and looking down at me. I am pinned like wet washing with his peg. ‘Till now, I thought the sweetest sound I could ever hear was cows chewing grass. But this is better.’ He sways and we listen to the soft suck at the exact place we meet. Then I move and put all thoughts of livestock out of his head.”

 

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2016/nov/17/bad-sex-awards-shortlist-blue-peter-janet-ellis

if you like this and are into podcasts, download "my dad wrote a prono" it is so funny

[Lurch the stalker]

Isn't this contradictory to this thread..?

[Readsalot]

#835030 +(21716)- [X]

<Khassaki> HI EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!!

<Judge-Mental> try pressing the the Caps Lock key

<Khassaki> O THANKS!!! ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE NOW!!!!!!!

<Judge-Mental> fu.ck me

 

#23601 +(17173)- [X]

<mage> what should I give sister for unzipping?

<Kevyn> Um. Ten bucks?

<mage> no I mean like, WinZip?

 

#602698 +(16145)- [X]

<death09>my girlfriend broke up with me and sent me pix of her and her new boyfriend in bed

<ktp753>ouch.

<death09>yeah.i sent them to her dad

 

#104052 +(14123)- [X]

<NES> lol

<NES> I download something from Napster

<NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done

<NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you"

<NES> "getting my song back fu.cker"

 

#25464 +(13292)- [X]

<kow`> "There are 10 types of people in the world... those who understand binary and those who don't."

<SpaceRain> That's only 2 types of people, kow.

<SpaceRain> STUPID

 

#329292 +(10093)- [X]

<Batty> Euch, rap is just missing one letter. c.

<zeep> rapc?

<Batty> ...

<Batty> Crap you idiot. you put the c on the other end

<zeep> oic

<Batty> Though you could also say it's missing an e

<zeep> wtf is erap?

* Batty bangs his head repeatedly against a wall

 

#628630 +(9518)- [X]

<samsim> I heard about this guy who broke into a lion's den at the zoo

<samsim> and got mauled

<samsim> and people were talking about how there should have been better defences put up to prevent people getting into the cage

<samsim> a friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of deterrent

<samsim> for example, putting some sort of fierce animal in the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in

 

#583977 +(9302)- [X]

<DannyB> some girl on the street asked if i was saved yet

<DannyB> i told her i saved at the checkpoint a couple minutes back

<DannyB> and can reload from there if i die

<DannyB> she was confused

 

#352172 +(9199)- [X]

<NHBoy> I broke my G-string while fingering a minor

<rycool> ...

<NHBoy> I was trying to play Knocking on Heaven's Door.

<NHBoy> Oh well, time to buy new strings.

 

#217453 +(9189)- [X]

<@Chin^> My sister caught me jacking off the other week and calls me a pervert

<@Chin^> just the other day i walked into my room and caught my sister masturbating

<@Chin^> So she calls me a pervert again?!?

<@Chin^> there is no justice in the world...

 

#365072 +(9150)- [X]

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Thank you for listening to me.

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> You know your a really good listener.

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Sweety please say something.

<Sandaedar> Ok I'm back.

 

[Patchelicious]

#835030 +(21716)- [X]

<Khassaki> HI EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!!

<Judge-Mental> try pressing the the Caps Lock key

<Khassaki> O THANKS!!! ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE NOW!!!!!!!

<Judge-Mental> fu.ck me

#23601 +(17173)- [X]

<mage> what should I give sister for unzipping?

<Kevyn> Um. Ten bucks?

<mage> no I mean like, WinZip?

#602698 +(16145)- [X]

<death09>my girlfriend broke up with me and sent me pix of her and her new boyfriend in bed

<ktp753>ouch.

<death09>yeah.i sent them to her dad

#104052 +(14123)- [X]

<NES> lol

<NES> I download something from Napster

<NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done

<NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you"

<NES> "getting my song back fu.cker"

#25464 +(13292)- [X]

<kow`> "There are 10 types of people in the world... those who understand binary and those who don't."

<SpaceRain> That's only 2 types of people, kow.

<SpaceRain> STUPID

#329292 +(10093)- [X]

<Batty> Euch, rap is just missing one letter. c.

<zeep> rapc?

<Batty> ...

<Batty> Crap you idiot. you put the c on the other end

<zeep> oic

<Batty> Though you could also say it's missing an e

<zeep> wtf is erap?

* Batty bangs his head repeatedly against a wall

#628630 +(9518)- [X]

<samsim> I heard about this guy who broke into a lion's den at the zoo

<samsim> and got mauled

<samsim> and people were talking about how there should have been better defences put up to prevent people getting into the cage

<samsim> a friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of deterrent

<samsim> for example, putting some sort of fierce animal in the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in

#583977 +(9302)- [X]

<DannyB> some girl on the street asked if i was saved yet

<DannyB> i told her i saved at the checkpoint a couple minutes back

<DannyB> and can reload from there if i die

<DannyB> she was confused

#352172 +(9199)- [X]

<NHBoy> I broke my G-string while fingering a minor

<rycool> ...

<NHBoy> I was trying to play Knocking on Heaven's Door.

<NHBoy> Oh well, time to buy new strings.

#217453 +(9189)- [X]

<@Chin^> My sister caught me jacking off the other week and calls me a pervert

<@Chin^> just the other day i walked into my room and caught my sister masturbating

<@Chin^> So she calls me a pervert again?!?

<@Chin^> there is no justice in the world...

#365072 +(9150)- [X]

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Thank you for listening to me.

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> You know your a really good listener.

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Sweety please say something.

<Sandaedar> Ok I'm back.

Hahahahaha post of the day!! How I miss those days.

[Slowbee]

http://imgur.com/a/a1h6R

 

so worth a repost.... (from page 2000)