The Pundits anti cycling

[Ofaniy]

So came across this today, not Friday yet, but hey, close enough. He seems like a real treat.

 

http://www.thepundits.co.za/never-take-cycling/

 

This past weekend, I took up the challenge of becoming a cyclist for the day. With no real cycling experience, I took it upon myself to partake in the 46km Durbie Dash – a road cycling race through the back-roads of Durbanville, Cape Town.

http://www.thepundits.co.za/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Durbie-Dash-Start.jpgThe first 30km of the race went smoothly and Sean, my racing partner, and I were flying through the kilometers much easier than I would have thought.

With 15km to go, my backside started taking a beating and with a left-turn taking us back towards Durbanville, things quickly started going from not so bad, to the absolute worst.

The final 15km was a mixture of very strong headwinds, uphills, an annihilation of my general groin area and an emotional roller coaster that I never want to experience again.

In all honesty, my legs and lungs were fairly solid throughout the race but the gnawing of groin-area vs bicycle seat is something that no man, or women I am sure, should ever be put through.

Seeing that I now have some experience in the field, I thought it well to compile a list of reasons why you should never take up cycling – you can thank me later.

It’s Expensive

As a runner, I’m used to only having to pay for running shoes. In fact, I lie – through relationships with various brands, I mostly get my running shoes for free. But, I would not mind paying R2000 to R2500 for a pair of top-of-the-range running shoes. That’s all you really need to buy – shorts and a shirt you can get on the cheap at Mr Price Sport if you’re strapped for cash.

Getting yourself ready for a cycle race? Not so cheap. Chris Willemse Cycles were the main sponsors of the race, so I went on their website to see what the kit that I had borrowed, would cost me more or less.

• Helmet – R 750 (that’s a cheap one, could be up to R2500)
• Shirt – R 350
• Shorts – R 699
• Bicycle – R 8 999 (the most expensive one is R 157 499)
• Speedometer – R 350
• Total: R 11 148

R 11 148 is quite a substantial investment into a sport. Keep in mind that this is working on minimum costs and if you’re looking at doing it more professionally than I did, you need to consider things like: lights, gloves, warm tops, extra wheels & tubes, hydration packs… the list honestly goes on, and on.

It’s Dangerous

I’ve always said that cyclists have a death wish and our 10km training run confirmed this. Riding on an open road where cars and trucks pass, is absolutely frightening and something I would not recommend. As a runner, I can stick to routes with sidewalks and run facing the traffic – this means I can at least see any danger that might be coming my way.

Some cars don’t care for cyclists and some cyclists don’t care for cars (never tell them this, they’re an edgy bunch) but the fact remains – not the safest sport out there.

Is it even exercise?

http://www.thepundits.co.za/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Durbie-Dash-Cycling.jpgNow, this might seem strange, but hear me out: The cycle race was 46km – the day after, my legs felt absolutely fine. No stiffness whatsoever, bar the pain in the region where the saddle removed my soul.

On Tuesday night, I played a game of Fives Futbol – writing this (Wednesday evening) I can still feel stiffness in my muscles and it feels like I actually worked out.

Personally, I’d much rather play a game of Fives than cycle 46km and not even feel like I did anything.

The Saddle

By far the worst thing about cycling. Hands down. You have never felt true emotions until you’ve experienced the feeling of having your soul sucked out of your backside, by a bicyle saddle. Seriously. Do not try this at home.

We can, reportedly, send a man to the surface of the moon, but we cannot develop a saddle that’s comfortable? Someone needs to get Elon Musk onto this.

It Makes No Sense

I’m not sure if this is standard practice at cycling events, but the strangest thing happened at the Durbie Dash.

The race started at Durbanville High School and was scheduled for 46km – when I reached the 45km mark, I noticed we were at least 3 more kilometers away from the school (I know the distance from running in the area), where I had assumed the finish line would be.

Nope, I was wrong – the finish line was, in fact, 2km away from the school and as I crossed it, I had no idea what was going on. It was only after I stopped and had a cigarette, that I realized they expected me to now cycle another 2km to reach the school where I could collect my medal, and more importantly, have a couple of beers.

Why not make it a 48km race then? Why not have a bakkie to take me that extra 2km? Why would anyone ever take up cycling? Why am I even writing this? Why, why, why?

[Headshot]

The who? Who cares. They claim to share a love of everything sport. Except cycling it seems. The author is a smoking runner. More like a couch potato I recon....

[Veebee]

send him a case

[Shebeen]

 

 

 It was only after I stopped and had a cigarette, 

what?! 

 

so all he really needed was a saddle that fits?

[bikebloke]

wimps shouldn't take up cycling there are too many doing it already ...

ow my ass hurts ......HTFU wimp !

 

anyway its on twitter no-one that matters will ever read it anyway

 

I think the author had a lesson at varsity between piss ups and smoking where he heard about irony and wit in journey skool - he is attempting it in this article (on twitter)

[bertusras]

Perhaps he should receive a list of why you should never take up smoking - he can thank us later.

[Duane_Bosch]

Yeah. This is the problem with the internet.

 

It gives idiots a voice. Bit much worse than that. It gives them an audience.

[BDF]

I think he must rather go back to playing girls soccer.

[Mamil]

Imagine the bleating if he did a 46k MTB

[RocknRolla]

http://s2.quickmeme.com/img/5a/5a1338989372ac4ae03d51fb741e67aeb2e1e73fc483e1a62ef681f22281a5d8.jpg

[bikebloke]

Ofaniy  email him a link so he can see all the nice things everyone is saying about him but wait till Friday so everyone can really get stuck in first  

[Jewbacca]

This is brilliant....

 

Duane.... watch that sort of comment.... I have seen many an opinion on this very site which fits very suggly into that catagory.

 

Does no one else think this is hilarious?

 

I have seen and heard a million 'cyclists' say similar things about running and swimming and various other sports.

 

Let the guy have his moment. He paid to enter a race, thus allowing CWC to sell you that set of wheels cheaper.... pffffft.....

 

This is bait to create a ruckus... don't bite.

[JJDT]

1. You can not compare running to cycling two different dimensions and also the costs invloded. I can basically say the same for Rugby/Soccer vs Running. The costs playing rugby/soccer is also cheaper than running a 10km/15km event.

2. Seeing that he is a runner and assume that he is relatively fit, cycling would be easy and also dependent on his pace. Should he be a first time runner the opposite would've been said tired legs, sore feet etc.

3. For the rest we know T.I.T.S is what counts.

 

Thanks for taking the time to tell me how expensive, dangerous and how unhealthy cycling is...you are dismissed...

[RocknRolla]

He has a right to an opinion as do we, If he is going to cry like a little girl because the cyclists has a go at him, then he shouldn't have written the article.

 

Sounds like the type of person that I really don't want sharing the trails or the roads with me anyways.

 

The real character of a person is revealed when the going gets tough.

[RaZor_007]

I have some for sale...   

 

 

[Skubarra]

We really are an over-sensitive lot....

 

So he didn't like cycling and he said it on the internet, nothing new..

 

What do we achieve by bashing him?