Diagnosed with stage 4 cancer - the long winding road it has become

[Cois]

Today is one of the hardest days ever for me.

 

I have zero energy, my mental state is not where I should be. I struggle to sleep and things are catching up.

 

This morning I had a bit of melon and papaya with some yoghurt. Noticed hairs in the bowl after I was done eating. So the hair-loss started. Weird thing is it started with my beard and two hours later I noticed my head itching. Just a bunch of loose hair there as well. Doctor asked if I was attached to the beard and I said no, but it seems that I was attached after all.

 

At this stage I am a mess. My tears (not from crying) are burning my eyes. At least the fever I had last night broke, and the worse of the nausea abated (CBD oil and some weed calmed it down) . Tummy is a little upset by the chemo, but I had the same problems last time and have meds to assist with that as well.

 

We are going to visit my folks tomorrow, just to get away from the city and to see their new puppy that they got yesterday. So at least something to look forward to

[Escapee..]

Today is one of the hardest days ever for me.

 

I have zero energy, my mental state is not where I should be. I struggle to sleep and things are catching up.

 

This morning I had a bit of melon and papaya with some yoghurt. Noticed hairs in the bowl after I was done eating. So the hair-loss started. Weird thing is it started with my beard and two hours later I noticed my head itching. Just a bunch of loose hair there as well. Doctor asked if I was attached to the beard and I said no, but it seems that I was attached after all.

 

At this stage I am a mess. My tears (not from crying) are burning my eyes. At least the fever I had last night broke, and the worse of the nausea abated (CBD oil and some weed calmed it down) . Tummy is a little upset by the chemo, but I had the same problems last time and have meds to assist with that as well.

 

We are going to visit my folks tomorrow, just to get away from the city and to see their new puppy that they got yesterday. So at least something to look forward to

 

Chin up Cois

 

Enjoy the weekend with the family

[Cois]

That puppy wants to see you get old so keep on keeping on. I cannot imagine your pain. Your life has touched many of us. Have a superb weekend Sir.

Was a very emotional weekend this far. Yesterday I had a problem breathing. Was bad, but my pulse was stable and my BP was in normal range, I did have a fewer, but that is due to the chemo, so did not visit the folks yesterday.

 

This morning I felt up to a visit (boy was I wrong) Copperhead your words hit real hard when I saw the puppy at my folks. Your words resonated in my head the whole time.

 

This is Abby

 

 

And this is either Fudge of Beano (my folks can’t decide what name to use.

 

 

So as I am posting this tears are streaming down my face. Its been a very tough and emotional day. I was way weaker than I have ever been and then my colostomy bag detached (just glad it was empty and that the pups did not take off with it) to top the day.

 

I am just thankful for my wife and my folks for the support. And when I mentioned the support from the Hub I could not keep the tears back

 

So thank you. Each and every one of you keeping up to date on this tread. I can’t fight this battle on my own, but I know I have all you folks on BikeHub waiting for the day that I am NED (No Evidence of Disease)

[Sepia]

Well done Cois, you are getting there. 

@Copperhead, well said Sir!

 

Cois, all the best mate.

[Eddy Gordo]

Cois, Keep on buddy, you doing great!!

Did you get a colostomy bag belt? 

Edited May 19, 2019 by Eddy Gordo

[Cois]

Cois, Keep on buddy, you doing great!!

Did you get a colostomy bag belt?

It is somewhere, but I do not wear it. It was a huge irritation the last time that I had it on. The bag is located on such a weird location that the belt keeps on slipping down to my waist. Might give it another go as I lost a few KG’s since the last time that I used it.

 

Problem is I stood up to close to the table and the device disconnected. The plate I stuck with some plaster because it was loose this morning after I replaced the old plate. The system I use is a two part. A plate and a loose bag (I am a clean freak and the one piece system did not work for me) but the brand I use have been going to crap. It feels as though they dump all their rejects on South Africa or the suppliers are dumping crap on us.

CANSA gave me another system that works better lasts longer, bu still prefer the one system because the one system has a bad with a flange with a double rim, and that was the crappiest idea ever.

[King_Crispy]

Cois, you're an inspiration.

Keep fighting the fight.

PM me your number and I will make time to come through to your side of town for a coffee and a pep talk

[Cois]

I am beyond negative today. Got two job rejections from applications. One I went for an interview and the other rejected me before interviews. But what sucks... the one job was advertised within 20 minutes from the time that I got the rejection letter on PNET. Same job, same reference number.

 

And the problem is I see this happening every day. Jobs that I apply for just gets rejected and advertised again on the web.

 

At least I went and got my UIF started yesterday. Just glad the Doctor gave me a letter to jump the line, as I did not make it far before I had to pull off the road due to nausea that overtook me and I vomited for the second time since I started chemo.

 

I am feeling sick today. I have sores in my mouth, and my glands are swollen. But I have to get out of the house and I am thinking of pushing through the pain and to take the bike to CowHouse tomorrow morning and attempting my first bike ride of 2019

[MrJacques]

A lady I know had colon cancer and we thought she was done for, but she pulled through and looks better than before. I think she's over 65. It's easy for me to say, but hang in there Cois. I really hope that things will get better.

[Edition 507]

Thinking of you Cois! Stay strong.

[ChrisF]

Cois go back to that company, and make a business proposal to them.

 

not "EMPLOYMENT" .. thus no risk and no exposure to them ...

 

But offer to work on a "contract/project/time basis" ....

 

 

 

Had a buddy that struggled to get "permanent employment" after a hart attack ... he had to change his mindset, and did well on a contract basis

Edited May 23, 2019 by ChrisF

[Cois]

Cois go back to that company, and make a business proposal to them.

 

not "EMPLOYMENT" .. thus no risk and no exposure to them ...

 

But offer to work on a "contract/project/time basis" ....

 

 

 

Had a buddy that struggled to get "permanent employment" after a hart attack ... he had to change his mindset, and did well on a contract basis

Both companies are academic institutions. But can still try.

The IT Manager at one institution said they are not running any projects now. Will maybe start a rollout next year.

The other company just did not advertise correctly at all. In the interview it came out that they need an CCNA qualified person and I had to correct the HR lady on that. So they just wasted my time from the get go.

 

But I am looking for anything at the moment. Even tried a coffee shop as a shop assistant and as soon as the guy heard cancer it was like talking to a brick wall. But he lost a client and all the clients that I told to support him after they heard what transpired.

 

It is tough out there at the moment as everyone cuts on IT first, and the unknown of a cancer patient added to the mix does not sit well with most companies.

Even one interview I went for with a guy who survived with Brain Cancer did not go well as the guy wanted me to work for him, but not while I was on chemo, because my hands was shaking due to the effects of chemo, and he did not like that.

[RobertWhitehead]

I'm really and truly sorry about the frustration you're going through Cois. People are really thick, I actually find it very interesting to see what people do in certain situations. 

 

Now this post is not meant to be a religious one (read it as you feel appropriate). People generally shy away from helping others, I would say its generally because of greed and the selfish times we live in.

 

The point I'm trying to make with my long winded banter is a simple one: People may think that they're "DIE KAAS BRA" and them not helping out is the be all and end all to the person sitting opposite to them but, there is a higher power (regardless of what any of us believe) and things work out not because of our influence but whether or not we choose to throw our hats in the ring and get involved  . We will all have to one day answer to our actions and or none.

 

I know its frustrating at this point in time and seeing people shy away and not offer you the opportunity you need sucks but the fact that you're still here (all of us for that matter) is a clear indication that there's still things to do, people to touch, an impact to make! 

 

If I had the ability to pay you a salary whilst you recover I would but alas, unfortunately I can only offer my perspective at this point of time  . All the best and I keep following your journey. If I can help in any other way please send me a pm 

Edited May 24, 2019 by RobertWhitehead

[CogitoErgoSum]

Thanks MadMarc

 

The symptoms was baffling. Sorry for the overshare, but maybe it will help someone else to see the warning signs.

 

I had a prolonged time of stomach problems. Runny stool, but I did account that to stress as I started a new job in April this year, and the problem started in July.

I took an antibiotic and that helped, but as soon as I stopped drinking the antibiotics it returned. The other curve ball was that the city of Tshwane or (however you spell that) sent out a notice of problems with the water supply so that was a bit of false hope. I started seeing some blood after cleaning, but with the amount of times that I had to visit the loo, bleeding was prone to happen.

 

I was feeling weak and at the height of it, I could not cycle more than 20 km without having to make a dash to the nearest loo.

 

I started showing blood and mucus in my stool, and that was when warning bells started sounding. I could not get to a Dr as we were busy with a huge project at work, but the one Tuesday morning, I could not take the pain anymore. We did not have water at the office, and I thought I injured my bladder holding out to take a wee, and then bumping into a table.

 

So on the visit the doctor pressed here and there, and I told him of the blood, and he pressed some more and I almost pooped his table from the pain. He found some blood in my urine, but it was nominal. Gave me some antibiotics and pain meds (the pain meds does not help for the pain) and off I went and was to see him on the Thursday.

 

So Thursday breaks and there is a crap load of blood in the loo. So decided not to skip the doctors visit.

 

Get there, he asks me a few questions and gives me a letter to go for a colonoscopy.

 

Few other details that pissed me off at the doctor, but went for the colonoscopy last week. While I was still in recovery the Dr spoke to my wife and scared the **** out of her (I do not have medical aid) and his first words were, "it is going to cost a lot of money"

 

So if you see any blood, where there is suppose to be no blood... GO SEE A DOCTOR. Do not take a chance with it!

Good day Cois. What was the procedure leading up to being diagnosed? Were you diagnosed purely from the colonoscopy, or did they do bloodtests as well? Any other procedures? Can this type of cancer be picked up on bloodtests alone? Did they do scans?

 

I am experiencing some of the same symptoms you mention. Not sure what to make of it. I have had an extremely stressful 2 years up to now, and have started a new job now that requires me to be away from home a lot (I have 6 flights set for June). And it the process we are also moving house. I simply can't get to a dr. I guess I want to ascertain how much time I need to set aside to get everything done at the dr...

 

I have been on Altosec for 3 months, and it has been better. But the RX is finished, and the symptoms are back.

 

I guess I am too scared for what the outcome might be...

Edited May 25, 2019 by CogitoErgoSum

[marko35s]

Good day Cois. What was the procedure leading up to being diagnosed? Were you diagnosed purely from the colonoscopy, or did they do bloodtests as well? Any other procedures? Can this type of cancer be picked up on bloodtests alone? Did they do scans?

 

I am experiencing some of the same symptoms you mention. Not sure what to make of it. I have had an extremely stressful 2 years up to now, and have started a new job now that requires me to be away from home a lot (I have 6 flights set for June). And it the process we are also moving house. I simply can't get to a dr. I guess I want to ascertain how much time I need to set aside to get everything done at the dr...

 

I have been on Altosec for 3 months, and it has been better. But the RX is finished, and the symptoms are back.

 

I guess I am too scared for what the outcome might be...

Not the same issues/symptoms as you but all I can say is make time and go to the doctor.

I was 'off colour' for months from December 2017, feeling flat, not entirely ill but not right, and ignored all the issues right through to early May 2018. 

In the end I was forced to go to a specialist as my weight suddenly dropped from 80kg down to 64kg in a two week period.Almost overnight I became too weak to even tie my own laces, needed help to walk across the bedroom etc.

Yet even then I was in complete denial that anything was wrong, to the point that when the specialist saw me and told me I had to stay in hospital that night and go in for a procedure the next day I fought like hell to go home (to be fair Liverpool were playing a CL semi final second leg that night, which is really important...). Have to admit when the words necrotic and kidneys are strung together in the same sentence it isn't something you want to hear. 

Anyhow - long story short, I had 100% kidney failure going on because I had refused to acknowledge the symptoms and had a major aversion to doctors. I never realized just how ill I was and found ways to justify ignoring the symptoms. And that, I was told later, all but killed me. Even after the procedure I was not expected to survive (but no way was I letting my wife off that easy  )

The single thing I took from this was - If your body is sending you a message then you need to listen.

[BigDL]

Not the same issues/symptoms as you but all I can say is make time and go to the doctor.

I was 'off colour' for months from December 2017, feeling flat, not entirely ill but not right, and ignored all the issues right through to early May 2018.

In the end I was forced to go to a specialist as my weight suddenly dropped from 80kg down to 64kg in a two week period.Almost overnight I became too weak to even tie my own laces, needed help to walk across the bedroom etc.

Yet even then I was in complete denial that anything was wrong, to the point that when the specialist saw me and told me I had to stay in hospital that night and go in for a procedure the next day I fought like hell to go home (to be fair Liverpool were playing a CL semi final second leg that night, which is really important...). Have to admit when the words necrotic and kidneys are strung together in the same sentence it isn't something you want to hear.

Anyhow - long story short, I had 100% kidney failure going on because I had refused to acknowledge the symptoms and had a major aversion to doctors. I never realized just how ill I was and found ways to justify ignoring the symptoms. And that, I was told later, all but killed me. Even after the procedure I was not expected to survive (but no way was I letting my wife off that easy )

The single thing I took from this was - If your body is sending you a message then you need to listen.

Holy Crap - thanks for sharing.