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Posted

well, on my side the process is pretty much wrapped up. No maintenance to pay, just shared costs with the little one, and as she's the primary caregiver, she gets monthly income from me, in lieu of costs associated with Mikey. I get an accrual claim from her estate, so it all evens out in the end.

 

Should all be finalised and divorced by the end of February.

That was pretty quick.

 

 

 

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Posted

well, on my side the process is pretty much wrapped up. No maintenance to pay, just shared costs with the little one, and as she's the primary caregiver, she gets monthly income from me, in lieu of costs associated with Mikey. I get an accrual claim from her estate, so it all evens out in the end.

 

Should all be finalised and divorced by the end of February.

Sounds like it is resolved as best as possible. Good luck China

 

 

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Posted

well, on my side the process is pretty much wrapped up. No maintenance to pay, just shared costs with the little one, and as she's the primary caregiver, she gets monthly income from me, in lieu of costs associated with Mikey. I get an accrual claim from her estate, so it all evens out in the end.

 

Should all be finalised and divorced by the end of February.

Well done man, must have taken some effort to keep it so efficient. Kudos to both of you ????????

Posted

well, on my side the process is pretty much wrapped up. No maintenance to pay, just shared costs with the little one, and as she's the primary caregiver, she gets monthly income from me, in lieu of costs associated with Mikey. I get an accrual claim from her estate, so it all evens out in the end.

 

Should all be finalised and divorced by the end of February.

It felt wrong liking this.... So I'll just comment and say at least it's being resolved amicably and fast
Posted

One day you will need to explain that part to me - 22 years off the horse so where to start looking ?

It will happen. All of us were once in your shoes and looking around to answer the same question. 

 

The good thing is clearly you dont want to be alone.

 

Yep you will need to learn a whole lot of new skills and things you never thought you would need again. Its pretty challenging and you will feel horribly exposed, but it's also pretty rewarding.

 

Wait until you are on the latest app or website and  have uploaded a profile and someone actually pays attention. It will feel very foreign, almost like taboo cause you never thought you would need to attract another significant other. Also pretty good after a while to realize you are desirable..

 

And seen as though you will be lean and mean from all your cycling etc you will be a better catch than most of the other knobs out there.

 

Play it slowly mate - a friend of mine went from "my life is over" to having a pretty wild social life for about 6 months in a matter of weeks when he put himself out there. Its pretty much true that you and most women know what they want after a certain age. It will also do your ego and self esteem the world of good to just do nothing serious and try some new stuff.

 

You just need to carry on putting one foot in front of another - like on a long ride, until you look back and see how far you have come. Just start somewhere. 

Posted

I know what you mean, dude.

But this comment is probably one of the most important.

 

I also managed to keep it civil and had a court date 4 months afterwards and we were done by April, so i could move on.

 

Its pretty difficult to do as you aren't exactly focused on being your exes best friend at that stage.

 

But the quicker you get the formalities out of the way and wrapped up the quicker there is nothing to argue about.

 

And keep away from lawyering up. Rather give in than go legal. Egos need to be parked at the door.

Posted

One day you will need to explain that part to me - 22 years off the horse so where to start looking ?

Thats easy

 

Re awaken all those sports and activities/hobbies you were keen and good at and get beck into them.Meet new people and hey presto.Join a squash club.Cycling club or whatever.Go to Gym

Or you can just join a dating site like millions of others do and away you go

Posted

Considering all the pain, tears and anger that so many couples and their kids go through, isn't it time that we simply leave marriages by the wayside? 

 

It's becoming increasingly common for folks here in Europe to not get married, but still have kids and live as married individuals, with less legal drama once everything goes pear-shaped. 

Posted

Strongs to all the guys going through a tough time.

 

I was with my ex for 5 years, got married and 6 months later she told me its over and moved out.

It was a huge shock to me and both our families.

Her reason, it wasn't what she thought it would be or what she really wanted. (I think she had an affair)

I asked her to come back (probably the thing I regret the most thinking back) but she said no and that was that.

Divorce was hassle free and I didn't have to do anything, just sign.

 

Was a very tough time.

 

She phoned me about 6 months after the divorce and begged me to take her back..I told her thanks but no thanks and moved on with my life.

Posted

She phoned me about 6 months after the divorce and begged me to take her back..I told her thanks but no thanks and moved on with my life.

That's like putting sour milk back in the fridge and hoping that it will be fresh the next day.

 

My fiance and I have only 1 rule in our relationship. If you choose to break up that is it. There will be no tearful reunion.

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