Uni Posted January 10, 2019 Posted January 10, 2019 Ii was just so sad knowing the love of my life is shacked up with another man The size of the house or wealth was not the issue.in my experience women after a divorce become real *****s, and it doesn't matter who wanted the divorce. It's a sad state of affairs when the ego is hurt and we (everybody) feels the need to lash out and hurt the other side. glad you had a good trip. My mate needed a rescue at one point but from her pics - looks absolutely amazing. Captain Fastbastard Mayhem and New Landy new life 2
Captain Fastbastard Mayhem Posted January 10, 2019 Posted January 10, 2019 in my experience women after a divorce become real *****s, and it doesn't matter who wanted the divorce. It's a sad state of affairs when the ego is hurt and we (everybody) feels the need to lash out and hurt the other side. glad you had a good trip. My mate needed a rescue at one point but from her pics - looks absolutely amazing. bloody right... jeepers.
New Landy new life Posted January 10, 2019 Author Posted January 10, 2019 in my experience women after a divorce become real *****s, and it doesn't matter who wanted the divorce. It's a sad state of affairs when the ego is hurt and we (everybody) feels the need to lash out and hurt the other side. glad you had a good trip. My mate needed a rescue at one point but from her pics - looks absolutely amazing.Thanks Uni - might explain why she had me drop my son there, instead of at her flat. P.S I had to tow a our convoy leader in a 3,5 ton fully loaded Nissan Patrol about 40 km back to Francis Town due to a broken Alternator bearing. The owner was not a Landy fan (Which he made quite clear at the start of our trip) so it was hard for him to accept my offer of a tow, seeing as I was the only vehicle without a trailer/caravan [emoji23] Uni, Steven Knoetze (sk27), dirtypot and 3 others 6
Uni Posted January 10, 2019 Posted January 10, 2019 Thanks Uni - might explain why she had me drop my son there, instead of at her flat. P.S I had to tow a our convoy leader in a 3,5 ton fully loaded Nissan Patrol about 40 km back to Francis Town due to a broken Alternator bearing. The owner was not a Landy fan (Which he made quite clear at the start of our trip) so it was hard for him to accept my offer of a tow, seeing as I was the only vehicle without a trailer/caravan [emoji23]haha my friend was also in a Nissan Patrol. She didn't say why they needed rescuing though, just that they were about 11km from civilization and needed saving. BigDL and New Landy new life 2
Plentipotential Posted January 10, 2019 Posted January 10, 2019 Need some more advice.I had my son with me from 18 December to 6 January and so I decided to deduct a portion I thought reasonable from my Alimony to my Ex to cover a small fraction of my expences and today when I return she sends me a threatening SMS that she is laying charges for a breach of a court order.Will I be looked down at by the court if I fight this or do I just give up? I'd pay twice what you're paying to be rid of someone like that! But like suggested, communication is the way forward. You should have asked and she should have queried it with you then set you straight with a friendly reminder of the court order. Guess that's what happens when the love is gone. Sorry about your troubles. Captain Fastbastard Mayhem, HDW, Hairy and 1 other 4
Honkdonk Posted January 13, 2019 Posted January 13, 2019 in my experience women after a divorce become real *****s, and it doesn't matter who wanted the divorce. It's a sad state of affairs when the ego is hurt and we (everybody) feels the need to lash out and hurt the other side. True story. My ex never failed at anything. The only thing that ever failed in her life was her/our marriage. Hence the constant anger and resentment towards me. Even though she says she is not angry and has forgiven me, her actions speak otherwise. Uni 1
Patensie Posted January 13, 2019 Posted January 13, 2019 My wife sprang the divorce surprise on me on 5 Dec. It sucks. I love her and really did my best. Some days are better than others. Today was not good. We still live in the same house. The kids don't know yet (6&4 yrs old). The reasons she gave are reasons you break up a std 8 relationship, not an almost 11yr marriage. I will get through this and I'm focussing on the best possible outcome for our children. Spoke101, Honkdonk, eddy and 4 others 7
New Landy new life Posted January 13, 2019 Author Posted January 13, 2019 Sorry to hear bud.Just remember we are all here for you as the rollercoaster is going to get very bumpy ahead for at least 12 months.Give and us us a P.M if you want to chat, either online or in person. Spoke101, BigDL, Patensie and 1 other 4
Captain Fastbastard Mayhem Posted January 14, 2019 Posted January 14, 2019 My wife sprang the divorce surprise on me on 5 Dec. It sucks. I love her and really did my best. Some days are better than others. Today was not good. We still live in the same house. The kids don't know yet (6&4 yrs old). The reasons she gave are reasons you break up a std 8 relationship, not an almost 11yr marriage. I will get through this and I'm focussing on the best possible outcome for our children.Crap dude, so sorry to hear that. Stetkte man. You're not alone Patensie, eddy and BigDL 3
Paul Ruinaard Posted January 14, 2019 Posted January 14, 2019 Google Billy Gundelfingers. The nastiest divorce lawyer in SA. He wrote an article now that was on news 24 about how his office goes crazy in January cause of all the divorces that start now. Me it was also 8 January. It's worth taking a breather and letting things calm down and then getting some good advice from counsellors to ensure you really ant to go through with an actual divorce is his advice. You can imagine that from him that is not what you would expect. And most of the people here are more experts on divorce that relationship counselling - just saying... Patensie and BigDL 2
New Landy new life Posted January 14, 2019 Author Posted January 14, 2019 Google Billy Gundelfingers. The nastiest divorce lawyer in SA. He wrote an article now that was on news 24 about how his office goes crazy in January cause of all the divorces that start now. Me it was also 8 January. It's worth taking a breather and letting things calm down and then getting some good advice from counsellors to ensure you really ant to go through with an actual divorce is his advice. You can imagine that from him that is not what you would expect. And most of the people here are more experts on divorce that relationship counselling - just saying...Well said, divorce is the last resort, but if they have made up their mind already, there is not much you can do. BigDL and Patensie 2
Captain Fastbastard Mayhem Posted January 14, 2019 Posted January 14, 2019 Well said, divorce is the last resort, but if they have made up their mind already, there is not much you can do.speaking from experience, that's 100% correct. Once my mind was made up, there was no chance of reconciliation. There were several points at which she could have saved it, if she'd been willing. Once those windows had closed...
Patensie Posted January 14, 2019 Posted January 14, 2019 speaking from experience, that's 100% correct. Once my mind was made up, there was no chance of reconciliation. There were several points at which she could have saved it, if she'd been willing. Once those windows had closed... I don't want to like your post for liking it feels wrong, but you are 100% correct. She's made up her mind. Paul Ruinaard 1
Honkdonk Posted January 14, 2019 Posted January 14, 2019 Patensie. Reach out bud. We are here for you. Hairy, New Landy new life, eddy and 2 others 5
CogitoErgoSum Posted January 14, 2019 Posted January 14, 2019 Sorry guys, I do not want to be insensitive. It was touch and go between my wife and I a short while back (I made a mess of things...). We are going for 15 years married this year. It has been rough at times (financial and personal stress on a marriage just kills it) Divorse happens just far too easy It is as if girls and guys just doesn't want to go through the effort that relationships require. Being married/engaged/in a romantic relationship requires effort. It requires commitment. From both. Both have to put the other before themselves. There are sacrifices that needs to be made by both. Both needs to help the other out with whatever the other finds as important. Sacrifices doesn't need to be big things (don't leave the dishes for the other, wash the effen dishes, even if you don't feel like it). Make time for one another. Commit to the other's needs, what they value. It is really an effort. If it wasn't an effort, or no effort was needed, then you shouldn't be together. That is when people live past another. That is when the other is of no importance anymore. Just my 2c worth of my experience thus far. I absolutely love my wife and our 3 kids. I cannot think myself into loosing them. I will fight for them, I will compromise whatever way needed to keep them. Marriage is an effort to build the other. Husband to build wife up. Wife to build husband up. Then the marriage will grow. Divorse is just too easy these days All the best to everyone going through this. Spoke101, Steven Knoetze (sk27), New Landy new life and 9 others 12
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