Stretch Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 male traits (being assertive, to be without empathy, to be cold and hard - not to be emotional, can't give afuck attitude, etc).Shlt....I must not be a male Captain Fastbastard Mayhem, Red Robin, CogitoErgoSum and 5 others 8
Captain Fastbastard Mayhem Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 (edited) That is not what I am saying... Read carefully and then again. And what I proposed was merely a little droplet of what could go wrong in marriage. Apart from both parties not pulling their weight in the relationship. I am only saying, society expects a woman to adopt male traits (being assertive, to be without empathy, to be cold and hard - not to be emotional, can't give a **** attitude, etc) to be succesful in their male dominated work environment. Women have to over compensate to succeed in the corporate world. She then goes home, with the same adopted traits and her husband doesn't understand what is going on. And then they fight. I never said women are not allowed in the corporate world. I never said thay should stay at home pregnant.Thanks for the clarification, and the bold bit, I agree with to a certain extent. BUT. It's a good thing. Women SHOULD be more assertive in the workforce, as it'll lead to better success in promotions and salary hikes (simplistically speaking, and in general. Greater levels of assertiveness correlate to higher levels of success in the corporate environment, according to many studies I've read) Also, there are women who are more aggressive / confrontational / "cold" etc than the average man. There are men who are more amiable / conscientious / kind than the average woman. That doesn't mean that if those 2 people are in a relationship, they'll fight / resent each other over time. It just means that people are the same, but also different. What ruins marriages and relationships is no communication, loss of respect, cheating, incompatability and many other things, INCLUDING the ascribing of certain rigid roles to a certain sex. Edited January 31, 2019 by Captain Fatbastard Mayhem BigDL, Red Robin, CogitoErgoSum and 2 others 5
Captain Fastbastard Mayhem Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 Shlt....I must not be a male LOL. Just means that you may be slightly more conscientious than Cogito. Which you're perfectly allowed to be.
Red Robin Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 That is not what I am saying... Read carefully and then again. And what I proposed was merely a little droplet of what could go wrong in marriage. Apart from both parties not pulling their weight in the relationship. I am only saying, society expects a woman to adopt male traits (being assertive, to be without empathy, to be cold and hard - not to be emotional, can't give afuck attitude, etc) to be succesful in their male dominated work environment. Women have to over compensate to succeed in the corporate world. She then goes home, with the same adopted traits and her husband doesn't understand what is going on. And then they fight. I never said women are not allowed in the corporate world. I never said thay should stay at home pregnant.I'm reading carefully and still don't agree. Damn must be bringing my 'adopted traits ' with me from the workplace. BigDL, Skubarra and Gen 3
Thor Buttox Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 LOL. Just means that you may be slightly more conscientious than Cogito. Which you're perfectly allowed to be.There is some seriously biblical reductionism going on here. We need some feng shui and pot pourri to bring out our feminine sides. (Sorry, I'm trying to put the Gen in Gender Neutral...) BigDL 1
Thor Buttox Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 I'm reading carefully and still don't agree. Damn must be bringing my 'adopted traits ' with me from the workplace.No, I just think my marriage is a total sham if he is right. Skubarra, Gen and Blackbeard 3
Gen Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 (edited) Thanks for the clarification, and the bold bit, I agree with to a certain extent. BUT. It's a good thing. Women SHOULD be more assertive in the workforce, as it'll lead to better success in promotions and salary hikes (simplistically speaking, and in general. Greater levels of assertiveness correlate to higher levels of success in the corporate environment, according to many studies I've read) Also, there are women who are more aggressive / confrontational / "cold" etc than the average man. There are men who are more amiable / conscientious / kind than the average woman. That doesn't mean that if those 2 people are in a relationship, they'll fight / resent each other over time. It just means that people are the same, but also different. What ruins marriages and relationships is no communication, loss of respect, cheating, incompatability and many other things, INCLUDING the ascribing of certain rigid roles to a certain sex.Mutual respect, communication, honesty and actually being able to get on well.. in other words being able to coexist ..to me is more important than love..I have seen far to many toxic relationship to say hold on to love....it alone isn't enough.. that is just my opinion. Edited January 31, 2019 by Gen Thor Buttox, Patensie, Blackbeard and 3 others 6
Skubarra Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 What ruins marriages and relationships is no communication, loss of respect, cheating, incompatability and many other things, INCLUDING the ascribing of certain rigid roles to a certain sex. This ^^^ I think its perfectly fine to have rigid ideas about the roles of different sexes. Just make sure you marry someone who share those principles. If you don't the blame is on you, not on "society that's changing" Thor Buttox, Blackbeard, Red Robin and 2 others 5
Captain Fastbastard Mayhem Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 Mutual respect, communication, honesty and actually being able to get on well.. in other words being able to coexist ..to me is more important than love..I have seen far to many toxic relationship to say hold on to love....it alone isn't enough.. that is just my opinion. Yeah, you can love someone without liking them, and then later on down the road the love turns to resentment if the liking doesn't return. This ^^^ I think its perfectly fine to have rigid ideas about the roles of different sexes. Just make sure you marry someone who share those principles. If you don't the blame is on you, not on "society that's changing"Yeah. 100% Gen 1
Slowbee Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 Mod Note: This discussion is slowly moving away from the original intention of advice on divorce and support for those going through a tough time. If you want to carry on the discussion in the direction that it is please do so on the Gillette thread, as that is where the current line of discussion will have more relevance. Sepia, Paul Ruinaard, Steven Knoetze (sk27) and 2 others 5
Captain Fastbastard Mayhem Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 Mod Note: This discussion is slowly moving away from the original intention of advice on divorce and support for those going through a tough time. If you want to carry on the discussion in the direction that it is please do so on the Gillette thread, as that is where the current line of discussion will have more relevance. ????????????????
Stretch Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 Mod Note: This discussion is slowly moving away from the original intention of advice on divorce and support for those going through a tough time. If you want to carry on the discussion in the direction that it is please do so on the Gillette thread, as that is where the current line of discussion will have more relevance. Someone's gonna look at this post down the line and say ...."the what thread?.. The Gillette thread?? " [emoji1787] Skubarra and Slowbee 2
Thor Buttox Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 Mod Note: This discussion is slowly moving away from the original intention of advice on divorce and support for those going through a tough time. If you want to carry on the discussion in the direction that it is please do so on the Gillette thread, as that is where the current line of discussion will have more relevance. Nothing like a bit of vaguely pointless Hub-squabbles to make people going through a hard time realise that things could be worse. Glasses half full and all that! Steven Knoetze (sk27), Amberdrake, New Landy new life and 1 other 4
Amberdrake Posted February 4, 2019 Posted February 4, 2019 Nothing like a bit of vaguely pointless Hub-squabbles to make people going through a hard time realise that things could be worse. Glasses half full and all that!The glass is always full......... it might just be a combination of water and air instead of just water. Just to mess with things a little bit. My little excursion this weekend to get away has gone really well. I went to visit my mom and she needed more than I did. Lazy relaxed and feeling good. Patensie 1
DJR Posted February 4, 2019 Posted February 4, 2019 ............... This guy is incredibly sharp. Uses words like precision scalpels. Impressive. She, on the other hand, is just good at trying to put words into his mouth. Interesting. Slowbee, Steven Knoetze (sk27), HDW and 1 other 4
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