Advice on Divorce

[Stretch]

Exactly...I would be like a scorned women [emoji1787][emoji1787]

[Rocket-Boy]

I did notice however that she did like a post on my feed where my girlfriend and I were seen together, so she must be looking what I am up to.

Ahh the rookie Facebook stalker error!

[Patchelicious]

Ahh the rookie Facebook stalker error!

The other one is by accident liking a 3 year old post on Instagram...... 

[Uni]

Ahh the rookie Facebook stalker error!

there's also the little psychological game of ... I see what you're doing ... 

women - don't try to understand them.

my friend's ex - the mother of his child would not leave the social whatsapp group, and everyone felt too bad to kick her out, so she would see all the plans being made, and then come up with something that needed my mate to be around, or he'd be away for a camping trip and then he'd be called back because the child is sick and **** like that. 

[Rocket-Boy]

there's also the little psychological game of ... I see what you're doing ... 

women - don't try to understand them.

my friend's ex - the mother of his child would not leave the social whatsapp group, and everyone felt too bad to kick her out, so she would see all the plans being made, and then come up with something that needed my mate to be around, or he'd be away for a camping trip and then he'd be called back because the child is sick and **** like that. 

Wow at that point where its impacting your life I would ask the admin to remove her, but do it in the chat itself so that she knew where it was coming from!

[The Bull Shark]

Wow at that point where its impacting your life I would ask the admin to remove her, but do it in the chat itself so that she knew where it was coming from!

 

Just start a new group. She will soon leave the group she is in by herself when she sees that it is dormant.

[Honkdonk]

Here's a question for the legal buffs..

 

My ex and I were married and subsequently divorced here in SA under the SA legal system.

She is now resident in NZ with the kids.

As far as I know nothing changes as the divorce order and settlement agreement is written and signed on SA soil and any disputes that may arise we need to do our best to settle amicably and not in a court of law with associated costs. 

We haven't gotten to that stage yet, and hopefully never will, but every now and then she throws something out there saying that I fall under the NZ law. They are not citizens yet and I reckon she is just being full of the brown stuff.

Should I decide relocate to NZ or the UK in the near future then things will change.

 

Anyone have experience with this?

[Amberdrake]

No expert but somehow I highly doubt she can try and apply a NZ law without a new court order.

You'r not subject to NZ law either and it becomes a diplomatic issue.

[Stretch]

As far as I know the law pertains to the legal system of where you were married. For example, here in Ireland you can only divorce after being separated for 4 years (soon to be 2). But if you were married in South Africa and divorced in Ireland, it would be immediate.

Edited June 3, 2019 by Stretch

[Spinnekop]

As far as I know the law pertains to the legal system of where you were married. For example, here in Ireland you can only divorce after being separated for 4 years (soon to be 2). But if you were married in South Africa and divorced in Ireland, it would be immediate.

My sister and hubby were maried in SA.

Moved to NZ.  Got citizenship. 

Had to divorce according to NZ law and regulations (Have to be 2 years separated etc.)

 

So I don't know if it was because they got residency? 

[Honkdonk]

Thought as much. She is trying her usual tactics to which I don't respond to..

 

I still keep in regular contact with the kids through video calls a few times a week. They are doing well and have adjusted nicely, which is good to see.

 

A very different life to what they were accustomed to here. Which is actually a good thing.

Still very hard though

[Stretch]

My sister and hubby were maried in SA.

Moved to NZ. Got citizenship.

Had to divorce according to NZ law and regulations (Have to be 2 years separated etc.)

 

So I don't know if it was because they got residency?

Interesting... With regard to my comment, I read it somewhere.. So I might have not had all the facts or just be wrong

[Patensie]

Interesting... With regard to my comment, I read it somewhere.. So I might have not had all the facts or just be wrong

you are correct according to my recollection of domicile from 1995 family law. We had 1 lecture on a complex issue where there is probably some international law involved. I'd rather ask a specialist...

[GrahamS2]

Here's a question for the legal buffs..

 

My ex and I were married and subsequently divorced here in SA under the SA legal system.

She is now resident in NZ with the kids.

As far as I know nothing changes as the divorce order and settlement agreement is written and signed on SA soil and any disputes that may arise we need to do our best to settle amicably and not in a court of law with associated costs. 

We haven't gotten to that stage yet, and hopefully never will, but every now and then she throws something out there saying that I fall under the NZ law. They are not citizens yet and I reckon she is just being full of the brown stuff.

Should I decide relocate to NZ or the UK in the near future then things will change.

 

Anyone have experience with this?

Your settlement agreement falls under, and can be enforced, in SA law. Where she currently resides has little bearing on it.

[Captain Fastbastard Mayhem]

Your settlement agreement falls under, and can be enforced, in SA law. Where she currently resides has little bearing on it.

and if I'm not smoking my socks, she can't do anything about it in NZ court, can she? Custody and maintenance agreements were formed under SA law, with (maybe) different laws surrounding this stuff. Can't all of a sudden try to change it to comply with NZ law / use any potential positive (for her) differences just because she moved there, correct?

[Amberdrake]

Its an interesting situation, I would honestly like to know what the real legal situation is here, would suck horribly if the agreement made could be ratified after allowing kids to leave.