Advice on Divorce

[Amberdrake]

My lawyer is one seriously scary woman, Nice as can be but wow she went "Ok this is what we doing", the question was implied but wasn't really up for negotiation.

 

I am gonna say one thing though if not for my friend (Best Friends fiance) I don't think anything would have gone nearly as well. Having someone else looking out for your interests makes a difference. She made me tell the lawyer everything(I forget she took notes all during week about everything we talked about).

 

If you're in this position try and have a friend like that around, makes the world of difference.

[Hacc]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRcD31sA2a0

[Amberdrake]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRcD31sA2a0

This video is really good!

[stefmeister]

WT actual F

My exact reaction when I learned of this.

My cousin broke up with his gf, but still managed to get her pregnant after the fact (I think it was entrapment).

He can't make ends meet to pay her maintenance, while she moved off some 600 km. 

Court orders his parents to foot the child support now, even though they were never married or even lived together.

[NotSoBigBen]

As a grandparent I can only say I would do it if I had to for my grandchild/ grandchildren

[Hairy]

what about her parents .... it takes two to tango!?!?

My exact reaction when I learned of this.

My cousin broke up with his gf, but still managed to get her pregnant after the fact (I think it was entrapment).

He can't make ends meet to pay her maintenance, while she moved off some 600 km. 

Court orders his parents to foot the child support now, even though they were never married or even lived together.

[Amberdrake]

This is scary stuff guys, So now we have to watch our own winky and those of our kids...... really seems silly. I'm sure the law was made with good intentions.

[Thor Buttox]

This is scary stuff guys, So now we have to watch our own winky and those of our kids...... really seems silly. I'm sure the law was made with good intentions.

Wouldn't the bigger question be, in a mature society, with proper parenting and education, 'Why does there need to be a law?'

 

(Yes, I know the world at the moment is as mature as a young cheddar)

[Shebeen]

My exact reaction when I learned of this.

My cousin broke up with his gf, but still managed to get her pregnant after the fact (I think it was entrapment).

He can't make ends meet to pay her maintenance, while she moved off some 600 km. 

Court orders his parents to foot the child support now, even though they were never married or even lived together.

I don't have all the info,

but it's stories like this that makes me wonder why ETV/dstv hasn't commisioned a local version of this:

 

or this:

[JScottP]

I don't have all the info,

but it's stories like this that makes me wonder why ETV/dstv hasn't commisioned a local version of this:

 

or this:

You mean something like this?

 

https://city-press.news24.com/News/dad-takes-on-papgeld-reality-show-claiming-defamation-20190203

[Shebeen]

You mean something like this?

 

https://city-press.news24.com/News/dad-takes-on-papgeld-reality-show-claiming-defamation-20190203

well there you go!

 

i'm sure it's just as cringeworthy.

 

this one is pretty much at the same level

[BigDL]

This is scary stuff guys, So now we have to watch our own winky and those of our kids...... really seems silly. I'm sure the law was made with good intentions.

My son is very different to how I was at 17. Girls absolutely love him for some reason, and he is constantly in demand, to the point where he avoids parties sometimes because so many girls are trying to snog him. We worry constantly about the temptations that he must have as a young man, but we have to trust his grounding and hope that he is responsible enough a) not to be bonking or b) if he (heaven forbid) is, that he is careful.

 

Having said that, if he knocked someone up and ended up unable to support his child, we would feel an obligation to support the child, who was not responsible for the situation.

[Amberdrake]

My son is very different to how I was at 17. Girls absolutely love him for some reason, and he is constantly in demand, to the point where he avoids parties sometimes because so many girls are trying to snog him. We worry constantly about the temptations that he must have as a young man, but we have to trust his grounding and hope that he is responsible enough a) not to be bonking or b) if he (heaven forbid) is, that he is careful.

 

Having said that, if he knocked someone up and ended up unable to support his child, we would feel an obligation to support the child, who was not responsible for the situation.

I don't disagree with the sentiment of supporting your grandchild, But with that said if your paying support, there should be some kind of interaction IMHO (I would want to be part of the life of kid).

[NotSoBigBen]

I don't disagree with the sentiment of supporting your grandchild, But with that said if your paying support, there should be some kind of interaction IMHO (I would want to be part of the life of kid).

You are 100% correct, should have added to my comment about helping if it was my grandchild ... I would only pay if I had reasonable access to the child that's for sure! Otherwise they could sod right off ...

[Steven Knoetze (sk27)]

I don't disagree with the sentiment of supporting your grandchild, But with that said if your paying support, there should be some kind of interaction IMHO (I would want to be part of the life of kid).

 

That would not be a given and would need to be in the family planning agreement.

I know you cannot refuse the biological father/mother visitation based on non payment of maintenance.

There is no obligation on the legal guardian to give grandparents visitation. That would be for the father/mother to arrange when they have the child for visitation.

Decency dictates though that if the grandparents were supporting the child, that the guardian would then allow them access.

Not much decency in the world these days and many times the kids are used as pawns in the fighting between the biologicals....,..

[Captain Fastbastard Mayhem]

Not much decency in the world these days and many times the kids are used as pawns in the fighting between the biologicals....,..

yeah, this is all too true. Starting to see it on my side as well, unfortunately.